Worse than Torture [Chores; Saeo, Open]

[Rowana]

T'ke wanted to find whoever had made the emergency chore list and dump than in a river of thread. The infirmary! Who had ever thought this was a good idea?! He had fainted at the sight of blood, for Faranth's sake! And here he was surrounded by it! It was like living in a nightmare everyday and he loathed it.

And then there was Saeo, his only little demon. She had apparently decided that he was her personal lackey and dragged him around after her doing random tasks. Most of these involved holding things, fetching things, or delivering messages. T'ke was almost starting to wish the Bendanites had taken over. At least then he'd be happily dead by now.

Grumbling to himself, T'ke dodged through the scattered beds, laden with a new batch of herbs and bandages. Even after so long, the temporary infirmary was packed with those who needed constant attention. T'ke found Saeo in one of the back corners. She seemed to be taking a break and he felt relieved. Carrying things one handed wasn't as easy as it looked. Setting the stuff down, he looked at her expectantly. "What's next?" he asked, without motivation. Just cause he had to help, didn't mean he had to like it.

[nightingale]

It was strange that Saeo was completely on her own. She was well aware of this fact, as she had taken great pains to ensure her own isolation. Cherilith was down by the river, being oiled by her incredibly enthusiastic younger brother who was more than happy to spend some time getting to know him. Freckle was playing jealous puppy dog to Manners after having seen him conversing with a female volunteer, and Baby was off finding an audience to perform his take on 'Come by the Hills' for. For the first time in a long time, her mind was quiet enough for her to think.

Unfortunately, the image of a faintly glowing Calistoth was one that she could not manage to scour from her mind.

Saeo was well aware of her dragon’s infatuation with the green, and from a purely objective point of view she couldn’t blame him. She was a gorgeous dragon, and despite her reputation she had never said a harsh word to him. Unfortunately she was also well aware that he had reached sexual maturity several months ago, and that when the green did choose to rise there was no doubt that he -correction, they- were going after her. With that terrifying thought in mind, she had been wracking her brain trying to figure out how she could manage to lose her virginity before it happened. It wasn’t a personal dislike of K’lir that was driving her, though the greenrider was definitely not the sort of person she could ever see herself bedding outside of flightlust. It was the fact that she would almost certainly end up bedding someone before the flight was over, and if she was worth her healer's knots then it was going to hurt. After hearing years worth of horror stories from her sisters, her virginity was not the kind of thing she wanted to lose while her judgment was clouded.

This was where her problem lay. Who in Faranth’s name was going to take the stupid thing from her?! All of the most likely candidates she had brought to mind were either injured or Jermayan –asking him was not an option- and so she was busying herself with thinking up other potential candidates. Her ear perked to the sound of T’ke’s unenthusiastic question. Speaking of candidates…

"Question." She stated plainly, not looking up from the sheet of parchment she was busy scribbling figures onto. She'd been taking an inventory of the infirmary's herbal supplies and was very close to finishing up, but more than that she found it far easier to ask something cloying and personal while multitasking. "You do like women, don't you? I mean, usually you can tell by the color of a person's dragon, but blues are somewhat ambiguous in that regard." She tucked a lose tendril of pale brown hair behind her ear, choosing to keep her attention on the papers before he so there was less chance of T'ke freezing up and not saying anything at all. Now THAT would be awkward.

[Rowana]

T'ke stared at Saeo, speechless for a moment. What kind of question was that?! T'ke was completely taken aback and he didn't know how to respond. Shard it! She wasn't even looking at him! "Umm...aaah," he babbled out. What was he supposed to say? He mentally slapped himself. Just say something! Maybe she would be satisfied and send him away. "Well..that is...I...I guess I do...I mean..." His eyes suddenly went wide. Was she accusing him of taking advantage of her in the future?! They did share adjoining weyrs now. "I mean, uh," he blurted quickly. "Not that I would...you know...do anything...without...asking." He trailed off, feeling very lame and self conscious. What was he saying? He had no control of what would happen when Garaeth chased someone! It was a thought that filled him with dread.

[nightingale]

“Oh, so you have thought about it?” She flicked her eyes up at him briefly, then scribbled her initials at the bottom of her inventory sheet. “Good, then I’ll just come out and ask. Would you mind terribly if I asked you to sleep with me? Just the one time of course, since I’m quite sure we would make a wretched couple…oh, not that I find you repulsive or anything like that. I just mean that we would get on much better as friends.” Without missing a beat, she neatly stacked the half dozen inventory papers she had completed into a pile and tucked them underneath a heavy jar filled with ambersap.

Shifting her chair to the side, she leaned her weight against one of the arms and peered up at her fellow bluerider. “I’m not trying to be creepy or anything you know. I just figured that we could help each other out…you did notice that Calistoth is glowing, right?” Her pale eyebrows arched questioningly. “I don’t know if Garaeth is planning to chase her or not, but Cherilith informs me that there’s no way he’s going to miss it. This’ll be my first time doing that sort of thing and…well I don’t want to get blindsided and end up hurting myself. You understand, right?”

[Rowana]

For a long, silent moment T'ke's face was unreadable. Then, as the reality of what Saeo was asking dawn on him, his expression changed into one of absolute horror. His eyes were practically popping out of his face and his mouth hung open as he stared at Saeo. No way. She could not have just ask what he had just thought she had. His hearing must be defective. That had to be it. There was no way Saeo had just asked to sleep with him. This could not be happening.

Garaeth, sitting patiently outside, raised his head in response to his rider's sudden distress. T'ke-mine? What is wrong? Are you alright? Do you need me to come? Garaeth could not fathom what had disturbed him so much and his voice was tinged with worry. His dragon's voice brought T'ke to suddenly realize how long he had been staring at Saeo. Hastily, he turned away, trying to look anywhere but at the girl who had cornered him. Mine? It's nothing T'ke said quickly. Garaeth was not convinced, but he stopped asking questions for the moment.

Think, T'ke, think! He berated himself mentally. What was he supposed to say? What could he say? Realizing he was taking too long to answer and that she might see that as an insult, his panic rose. Say something! Anything! "You can't really mean," he blurted out, "you and me? Together? In bed?" He had know he would loose his own virginity this way some day soon, but at least Garaeth didn't seem inclined to chase just yet. "Not that I don't like you!" T'ke's voice was getting faster and more high pitched as he babbled. "I do. Just not that way. Not that I don't want to help! I would, if I could. Well, I can, but I don't want to! I mean! Are you sure someone else wouldn't, you know? There has to be someone else. Not that I want you to! If you don't want to and...and..."

T'ke's voice trailed off as he ran out of things to say. He wanted to run. He wanted to be as far away from here as possible. Maybe even take Garaeth and fly to the other side of Pern. He would rather face a dozen Bendan riders or be stabbed in the gut. Anything but be right here, right now.

[nightingale]

Saeo frowned, freckles gathering over the bridge of her nose as displeasure rippled across her face. She hadn’t exactly expected him to shrug and agree, but the sheer horror that she had seen in T’ke’s expression was a poorer reaction than she had prepared herself for. She felt the insult cut right past her thin defenses and stab her heart painfully. Her eyes stung as she dropped them to one side.


“Shut up.” She snapped midway through the boy’s rambling, taking a deep breath to keep from saying anything spiteful. The girl shifted her chair back to it’s proper position and reached for a fresh sheet of parchment. “I’m not going to rape you T’ke. It was just a request…and you might have simply said ‘no’ if you weren’t interested. Just because I’m not pretty doesn’t mean I’ll melt your skin on contact…”

[Rowana]

T'ke was shocked into speechlessness again. Great, now he had made her upset. Why couldn't he talk with girls? Every time he tried they always seemed to end up crying or walking away. It didn't help that his only real experience with woman was his stepmother. He winced. She had had her own ideas about behavior and discipline. T'ke ran his hand through his hair. Why was he supposed to say?

He looked at his shoes. "It's not that," he said softly. "I think you're lovely. I always have." He was sincere. He didn't see any reason Saeo would think she wasn't pretty. She was, in a soft, quiet way that T'ke liked. "That's why..." He hesitated before going on. "You deserve someone better than me," he said finally.

[nightingale]

The girl huffed quietly, giving her head a little shake as she set about listing different kinds of bandages neatly on the blank parchment. “You don’t need to make stupid excuses.” Saeo told him curtly. She wasn’t usually so callous, but much of her sensitivity was being lost amid the whirl of unpleasant emotions she was struggling to rise above. “I’m not one of those girls who need to be constantly adored in order to feel good about themselves. I know that I’m all scratched up and scrawny, and it only gets worse when my clothes are off so you don’t need to try and make me feel better about it.”

She dabbed at the corner of one eye to make sure that she wasn’t crying, disguising the gesture to make it seem as if she was touching up her eye paint. In spite of the detached and eccentric way she often behaved, Saeo was a fundamentally emotional and easily offended person. Of course, this was something she would never admit, even to herself. “It’s no big deal.” She insisted, giving her shoulders a shrug. Her voice was slow and steady, creating a façade of a casual indifference that sharply contradicted the rest of her behavior. “I’ll just keep asking around is all. Goodness knows that with so few greens rising lately, there has to be some hot and heavy rider out there who’ll be willing to help me out.”

[Rowana]

T'ke's face fell. How could Saeo think so little of him? Did she really think he was so shallow? He supposed he couldn't blame her. He knew he was very good with people, especially girls. It was no wonder they all thought he was superficial and callous. He didn't want her to do anything stupid, but he had no right to stop her. She was right, in that respect, they both had little control of who their dragons chased or caught. Whatever they did, it would rarely be from their own choice. Love was a luxury dragon riders could rarely afford.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I didn't mean to upset you. I'll go away now, if that's what you want." He looked at her briefly, then at the floor again. For some reason it was hard to look her in the eye. "I meant what I said," he added softly. "You are beautiful. Even if other people can't see it. You have more heart than anyone I've ever met."

T'ke turned away. "Just don't throw that away for nothing." He started to walk away, fighting the chocking feeling in his throat. She probably didn't want to see him again now. He was the one who had mad her upset. Then, why was he the one who felt like crying?

[nightingale]

Saeo flinched. Oh shells…why had she gone and said that? Even as she asked herself the question, the girl knew what her answer was. She had said it because in a moment of severe mental retardation, she had forgotten that T’ke was not the sort of person who would lie to her about something so important. It took her a moment to set her quill and push back her chair, but once she was standing she wasted no time in clearing the distance between them and pulling him into a tight hug.

“I’m sorry.” She murmured, pressing her face into the centre of his back. “I just…I didn’t mean…I’m an idiot.” She took a few deep breaths, fighting the urge to break down and start crying. She had been doing that far more than she ought to over the past few months, and she didn’t need T’ke thinking that his only use was that of a large, human shaped handkerchief. “You’re a perfect darling, you know that?” She laughed humorlessly, pulling him a little closer. “You’re the one that deserves better, not me. I don’t know how I would have survived all this without you T’ke. You’ve always been so good to me, and all I do is tear you up and order you about… I seem to do that to everyone lately…I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

It seemed to Saeo that ever since the attack she had been constantly tearing into one friend or another, and because they were on the same chore rotation T’ke was getting the worst of it. She hated it. She hated always feeling angry and miserable, but for some reason she just couldn’t get it to go away. She missed Pepsi. She missed seeing Raylin smile and she missed how easy life had been before Benden swooped in and ruined everything.

[Rowana]

T'ke stiffened as Saeo pulled him into a hug. Was she going to cry again? He honestly never knew what to do when she did that. He turned back nervously and looked at her. Darling? Him?! He was pretty sure no one had ever called him that before. In fact, he was pretty sure Saeo was the first girl to ever be so nice to him. T'ke felt his cheeks flush. This was embarrassing, but he had to admit it made a nice change.

T'ke patted Saeo's shoulder awkwardly. "It's alright," he started. "I mean. You keep me busy, but at least I'm being useful." Unlike during the attack. Fainting had been a great way to help out, he thought sarcastically. What else could he say? "Um. Want to take a break?" he suggested. "I think there's juice and sweetrolls in the Main Hall." He wasn't necessarily hungry, but maybe they could talk more, as friends. It looked like Saeo needed someone to talk to. In his mind T'ke felt almost shocked as he realized that he did think of Saeo as a friend now. When did that happen? Garaeth was right, he mused. He had to give people a chance.