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Post by dragon on Oct 1, 2011 22:33:45 GMT -5
Normally, she wouldn't bother him while he was busy. Normally, since impressing Aikelyth, Isori never came back to the Candidate area. But this was a special case, and it was a spare moment she had. So she took it. Making her way over to the Candidate barracks, she padded past the clusters of unlucky young folk and made her way to the office.
She knocked, but only as a formality. Because she didn't hardly wait at all before pushing it open and slipping in before pushing it shut again. But that was all the far she went, stopping right there by the door and even leaning on it a little. Naturally she took a look around to see if there was anyone else occupying M'kai's attention at the moment. Not that that really mattered either. For it wouldn't change what she did next.
"We need to talk." She said simply, leaving it at that for the moment.
Mostly because, while the topic needed to be broached, she had no idea how to do it ... good bad or ugly wise. That, and once broached, she had no idea what would come afterward. Which was part of why she'd put it off as long as she had. But now she couldn't. Now, everything was to be told. The only thing that gave away her case of nerves though was the way she idly fiddled with the hem of her loose shirt. For in every other way her features were schooled quite well into placidity.
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Ruby
Shiny Hoarder
Jr.Weyrwoman Caden Bronzehandler Piden Bluerider M'kai Bluerider T'ri Greenrider Tenlie Greenhandler Serissa
Posts: 1,524
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Post by Ruby on Oct 7, 2011 15:16:20 GMT -5
M'kai didn't usually have much in the way of paperwork, but after a clutch it always got worse (not to mention that he tended to procrastinate horribly, and deadlines were approaching). This meant he spent more time in his office than usual, which was good, because otherwise Isori might have missed him. Generally, he was long gone by now, a full candlemark after lessons. As it was, he glanced up at the knock, started to call out "Come-" and was interrupted by the Weyrling coming right on in.... and closing the door and stopping. Well, wasn't that odd.
"Oh, Isori, nice to see you. As always." Yeah, it was a bit overly formal, but she was staying back so stiffly he couldn't help but fall into standard workplace patterns. Stacking the papers in front of him in to a more orderly pile, he set them aside, then gestured at the chair across from him. "We can talk now? I'm not doing anything important. Is it, er, something official?" he asked, brows furrowed. This was very unlike Isori - M'kai could tell something was wrong, but she didn't seem to want to admit it, and he couldn't figure out if he should treat her like a student, here in his office, or like... whatever she was. Girlfriend. Partner. Something.
Usually things were so easy between the two of them, it was odd to have it be uncomfortable like this. Serious. M'kai always thought of Isori as fun, spontaneous, the whole deal, but now that he thought about it more that was mostly when it was just the two of them. Add another person and she got more reserved. So why was she treating him like some other person? "Is everything... ok?" Had he been spending too much time with A'emi? He knew the Greenriders didn't exactly approve of each other, but M'kai had to admit that having A'emi back had been a huge help when it came to distracting himself from spending every free moment with Isori, which was both pretty obviously over the line for a Weyrling and also incredibly filled with temptation. Ugh. Relationships: too hard.
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Post by dragon on Oct 7, 2011 21:55:30 GMT -5
There wasn't anyone else in here ... Isori about melted with relief to see that. Since there wasn't anything else to block the way, she moved away from the door. She offered a small, brief smile as he mentioned that it was nice to see her. Maybe she had prompted his rather officalish reaction to her, but it didn't help her any at all. It was harder to relax, harder to have any ease on why she was there at all. Ironic as that was. She didn't want to sit in the chair he pointed her to, she wanted to go around the desk to him. But, this was his domain. Almost reluctantly she slid into the indicated seat.
"No, no ... it's not anything official. But important, yes. At least, I think so anyway ... um." She ground to a halt, before heaving a sigh. "No, not everything is okay. I am ... I am ... " again she ground to a halt, grimmacing and picking at her hem again even as she watched him. "I ... I am ... I ... oh shardit. M'kai ... I just ... I don't know where I stand with you. I mean ... I know I'm a weyrling and all that. But ... but ... what am I?" She asked, dodging her main issue for the moment.
Why did this have to be so difficult?! Probably because it was a place she had never been before, no matter which way it was sliced. And probably because she was making it so. She was more than certain that she was doing it wrong ... someone somewhere could probably do this so much easier than she was, with so much less stress.
But at the same time she was terrified, afraid that he would tell her that she wasn't anything. Just a passing ... thing. She hoped to Faranth that wasn't the case, but she wasn't going to say anything that would alter his answer from the truth either. Isori knew that she could take her licks, even if she didn't like it at all. Or maybe she was just thinking herself into a tizzy too. But she'd had a lot of time to wonder ... too much time, it seemed. Especially with the reintroduction of other people that could ever so easily steal his attention away. People who weren't weyrlings and illegal. Or maybe she was just paranoid. Whatever the case was, she needed to know. Wanted to know. Once she knew where she stood with him, then she could start to figure out everything else that was currently haywire. But this ... this was the clinch.
Isori only hoped that her face wasn't giving away all the tumultuous thought writhing around in her brain. She hoped that all he could see was that she needed an honest answer. She didn't want even her expression to sway his answer off course of true, even if it might make life easier in the short run. Isori wasn't about the short run, she preferred wrangling the long run.
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Ruby
Shiny Hoarder
Jr.Weyrwoman Caden Bronzehandler Piden Bluerider M'kai Bluerider T'ri Greenrider Tenlie Greenhandler Serissa
Posts: 1,524
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Post by Ruby on Oct 13, 2011 3:06:01 GMT -5
"Ha!" M'kai barked a laugh when she finally explained herself, then shook his head, straightened a paper, and got up to walk around his desk. In a few steps he was by Isori's side, and he leaned down to kiss her on the temple and hug her around the shoulders before he pulled up the other chair on her side of the desk, so they didn't have the big wooden monstrosity between them. Settling himself in, he crossed one ankle over the opposite knee, then cocked his head at Isori, looking her over. Pretty as ever. She seemed to have put on a bit of weight recently, but only in the best places - she was filling out her top even better than normal, and just looked so healthy. By this point in training, most weyrlings were run ragged.
"So," he started, then reconsidered his casual position and put both feet on the floor again, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. "You're just a weyrling, that's true enough, so for now we're nothing, clearly. Bad enough that you're a Weyrling, but I'm the Candidatemaster, and you weren't a candidate so long ago yourself." True and true, she knew this already. It had been discussed, if briefly and generally during intimate moments. "However."
That's usually where their conversations on the topic ended - a promising however, hanging in the air. Not today, though. Aikelyth was nearly old enough to move in to her own weyr, and she'd be ready to Rise in another three months or so. No point in having Isori move in to some weyr of her own in the mean time. "You and Aikelyth will be moving into your own weyrs soon, and since all of the Burimyu - er, new Selenitas - weyrs are made for two, I was thinking you could just move in with me. We'd have to run it by Sel'n, probably pledge our right arms we won't sleep together before Aikelyth's ready," The absolute nonchalance with which M'kai delivered that line was practically prize-worthy, "But it just makes more sense to do it now, so you don't have to move again in three months. So I guess, once you're not a Weyrling anymore, you're my Weyrmate."
Had he asked? Not exactly, but M'kai had never really been a man to ask. He did feel the need to add a disclaimer, though. "I'll warn you that I'm not the best at commitment. I'll do my best - I wouldn't ask you to move in otherwise - but I'm weyrbred, and Futh will still chase, obviously, and occasionally... well, sometimes I'm just not a great person. Like I said, I'll do my best. I just don't want you to think I'm better than I am." There. He'd said it, although honestly if Isori didn't know that already, she hadn't been paying a lot of attention. Settling in to a more comfortable position, he added, "Better?"
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Post by dragon on Oct 13, 2011 21:34:36 GMT -5
The 'ha!' exclamation shocked Isori ... and she had no idea what to think of it at all. What was that supposed to mean, anyway? She watched him sort his papers one last time before he got up to come over to her. She smiled hesitantly at the kiss he laid on her temple, and the very cautious-seeming hug he gave her shoulders. That, too, could mean anything. So she continued to hold her silence as he dragged over the other chair and sat down as well. It seemed to take him a bit to get comfortable in it, shifting about.
She offered a slight, singular nod in agreement to his statements toward the obviousness of the situation. She was just a weyrling, and very recently his student on top of that. He was definitely still the Candidatemaster. But, even as these were given, she could only wonder why he bothered to reiterate them. Was this a warm up to something horrible?
Okay, she was just being emotionally unstable again, thinking the worst. She shoved those thoughts into the corner and continued to hear him out, determined to try and be logical about solving this problem. However ironic this was ... trying to logically solve an emotional issue.
What he said afterward shocked her - in a happy, good way. He wanted her to move in with him? To be his weyrmate? The shocked expression melted into a smile, which quickly spread to a beaming expression that took up all of her. "Really?" She asked softly. Oh, she wanted to just jump on him and hug him to bits. But she refrained from it, instead fiddling with her hem again.
But ... there was always that other shoe. It had to drop eventually, and she was now worried that it might make him change his mind ... but all she could do was say what she had to say. There was nothing for it, she could only hope for the best, that what he'd just offered her wasn't snatched away in the blink of an eye. "I'd like that, M'kai. I really would!" She started, just to make sure he knew that. "But ... there's ... there's more that I need to talk to you about. I ... I needed to talk to you because I have to ... have to talk to Sel'n here very soon. Before I get much farther in my lessons actually." She admitted.
"I ... " She trailed off for a moment. If he'd told her off and sent her away, she never would have told him this. She would have just handled it by herself, unwilling to have dropped it on him as what would have appeared to be pressure. Now, it was different. He wanted her! This idea thrilled her, and she could only hope that she wasn't fixing to shatter it. "I have to tell him I'm pregnant before we start between lessons." She said finally, hoping that he'd take that news well. Instead of freaking out. "I ... I know I'm going to get in trouble for that, too." She was about to twist the life out of her hem, but the cloth was holding up so far. "But I'll do my best not to ... to ... cost you your job." Because, as he'd so clearly pointed out before ... the two of them weren't exactly legal no matter which way it was sliced. Isori offered him a hesitant smile, hoping that everything would be okay still. Or, as okay as it could be given the circumstances.
But ... that problem was probably going to throw a kink in M'kai's original plan to have her move straight away into his weyr. She couldn't protect him from incrimination (if that was even possible still) and then turn around and blithely move in with him. Any idiot would connect those dots. That concept saddened her.
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Ruby
Shiny Hoarder
Jr.Weyrwoman Caden Bronzehandler Piden Bluerider M'kai Bluerider T'ri Greenrider Tenlie Greenhandler Serissa
Posts: 1,524
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Post by Ruby on Oct 19, 2011 16:10:50 GMT -5
Well, she was smiling, which was a good sign, but she'd asked for confirmation and fiddled with her hem instead of being happy, and that pushed M'kai's confidence just slightly out of whack. Had she meant 'really, you want me to move in with you?' or 'really, you ask me to move in and then tell me you're basically a dick'? Well, either way the answer was the same, so M'kai replied "Really," doing his best to keep from looking a touch concerned. Show confidence and those you were negotiating with would be confident in you as well. Things he'd learned back at Benden, things that had served him much better in relationships with women than they ever had for their intended uses. Selenitas rarely had need of negotiators, and if they did they usually called on Queens and Wingleaders, not blueriding candidatemasters. Oh well.
And then she finally got around to saying yes, and M'kai smiled, only to have that smile transform slightly into a puzzled look as she went on. "Sel'n? What does he have to do with this? Did you sleep with S-?" he broke in when she trailed off, then realized exactly how stupid that was and shook his head, catching himself before he finished that statement. "No. Sorry, he's old and crotchety, not exactly your type, I hope. Go on." M'kai flashed a charming smile to cover up his sudden insecurity, making a mental note to keep an eye on the Weyrlingmaster next time he saw the Brownrider and Isori together. Had M'kai just asked a girl to move in with him, accused her of cheating, promptly dismissed that claim as ridiculous, then continued to be jealous about it, all in the span of a minute or so? Yes. Welcome to life with M'kai.
It was a good thing Isori seemed pretty focused on what she had to tell him. She might as well have not heard him (and honestly, M'kai was kind of talking to himself more than he was trying to have an actual conversation, word-vomiting his mental process), so she came out with it pretty quick. "You're." Pregnant. He couldn't get himself to say it, and M'kai's vaguely puzzled expression changed to one of pure horror. "But. What? How? I don't get it, I've hardly even slept with you." He considered asking if it could possibly be someone else's, but decided that might not be the most tactful thing ever If she was offering to hide it for him, it had to be his, right? "And we were careful. Most of the time. How long have you known? Or, I mean, how long have you been pregnant?"
M'kai did not like kids. He did not like babies one bit - they were sticky and gross and smelly. Baby things had always been Cr'oph's strong point. Hence the look of horror, not the happy excitement most soon-to-be fathers might have experienced. As he considered it, though, M'kai decided that if he had to have a baby with anyone, he'd rather like that anyone to be Isori, so he made an effort to smile, to look happy instead of terrified. It sort of worked, and he ended up looking kind of eagerly pained, but at least hopefully she wouldn't cry? Blinking at Isori for a few moments, M'kai added, "Forget about me for a second. How are you? Everything going alright? Healthy, all that? Have you been to see a dolphin? Do you... do you know if it's a girl or a boy?" As he spoke, the panic subsided a little - Cr'oph would have a field day with this, but for the moment (without any actual babies involved quite yet) he was feeling a bit better about all of this. As good as he could, given the circumstances, so he sat up and held out his arms to Isori, tacitly inviting her for a hug. Everything would be ok?
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Post by dragon on Oct 20, 2011 13:49:18 GMT -5
Did he just ...? He did! He accused her of sleeping with Sel'n! Isori's mouth opened in disbelief at what she was hearing even as he hastily retracted that. Then she clopped her mouth shut, her mouth twisted into a little knot. She really couldn't argue any point he might have used to come to that conclusion. Even if it was untrue. For neither she or her twin had been exactly monogamous in any pseudo-relationships they had cooked up before the take over. That, and it was also silly to say Sel'n was her master ... because at one time so had M'kai been. There really was no straight way out of that hole he'd just presented. It was easier to just let it slide away without any comment at all and more or less let him stumble over it. Instead of stumbling over it herself. It was ... simpler. Instead she offered him a return smile to try and help that one slide by, too. "No, he's not my type." she agreed.
At least he wasn't retracting his invite to live with him as fast as he had that last. Instead he was just stumbling over everything. Unfortunately, it looked like outright horror. Which ... wasn't good. Isori wasn't at all sure what to do about that ... until he started asking some of the most absurd questions and saying some rather silly things. In the end, all she could do was laugh. Partly because, well, he was being so silly, and because the tension was too high. Nothing else could be done. "What do you mean how could that happen? You were there, silly. Obviously." She pointed out. "And it only takes once." Another not-so-cute fact of nature. But the mirth slid away as fast as it had come, and she heaved a slow sigh.
M'kai going on his own confused roller coaster really wasn't helping her own emotional swings any at all. She wasn't used to this at all. She was used to being stable. Was this really doing this to her? Why couldn't she follow one line and stick with it instead of swinging back and forth all the time?? Sharding hormones.
"I have been since ... since I gave you your jacket." Isori supplied. It was easy to figure out when she'd conceived. Because, as he'd pointed out, they hadn't slept together more than twice. Five months apart. "I found out a few months after that ... and I have been hiding it since then. But soon I won't be able to. Sel'n will see, and I really don't want to start betweening lessons like this." She had somewhere along the way stopped twisting the life out of her hem. Isori also realized with wry humor that there was no way Sel'n was going to let her move in with M'kai. For many reasons... obviously they'd already broken said rule once. What was to assure him that it wouldn't happen again? Worse, she couldn't move in with him without implicating him ... something she didn't want to do. She knew M'kai liked his job.
She blinked when the line of questioning turned. "Me?" She asked blankly. "Oh, um. I'm ... okay? I think? I mean ... I don't know. I've never done this before. I certainly haven't told anyone." Too many questions!! She couldn't keep track of them all. "A dolphin? No. We don't have dolphins in the Weyr do we? I don't exactly travel ..." She pointed out. That, and had it occurred to her she probably wouldn't have done it. Talk about a dead give away that she'd busted some rules, much less might or might not be pregnant for it. The last question garnered a hesitant smile from her as she shook her head. "No, I don't know. I just ... am. I don't need a dolphin to tell me that."
Just as soon as M'kai offered a hug, something that she hadn't at all expected given the wild swings going on for both of them, Isori moved. More or less flinging herself at him, into his arms. Wrapping her own arms around him tightly, it was all she could do to not burst into tears. Mostly from stress relief. Everything would be okay. He hadn't told her off, he hadn't tossed her out. Uncertainty had a hold of them both, but was that really all that unusual? Finally she mastered herself - something that used to be so very easy - and she managed a strangled "Thank you" instead of anything explosively emotional as had been threatening.
There was only a few hurdles left, now. One of them being in telling her Weyrling Master. Oh, joys.
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Ruby
Shiny Hoarder
Jr.Weyrwoman Caden Bronzehandler Piden Bluerider M'kai Bluerider T'ri Greenrider Tenlie Greenhandler Serissa
Posts: 1,524
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Post by Ruby on Oct 22, 2011 3:21:03 GMT -5
((End thread! I'm gonna make a thread for M'kai and Orena soon... probably Sunday))
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