Please don't hate me? (Kaegan)

[Rowana]

It was only a day or so after Millieth's Hatching. G'tor had waited until Millieth had taken Kaegan back to her room before rushing to see how his own dragon was doing. Ruskeath insisted he was fine, but G'tor had taken him to the infirmary just the same. They'd waited until Behruth was treated, relieved to hear the other brown was still alive. Then Kalierre had cleaned and treated Ruskeath's cuts. The ones on his nose and above his eye would leave scars, but G'tor was just glad he'd been lucky enough not to loose the eye altogether.

Now G'tor was pacing outside Kaegan's door, trying to decide if he really did want to see her, or if she even wanted to see him. She hadn't been very happy with him on the Sands and he could hardly blame her. He'd been right there and all he could do was stand around and watch like a fool. He'd even shouted at her, just because Ruskeath had decided to loose his temper. So much for training to be able to deal with situations like that.

Ranchan, who had decided to come along, trilled lazily in his ear. At least someone was still happy today, G'tor thought as he patted her head. He started to knock on Kaegan's door, but stopped and paced again. I thought you were going to check on her, Ruskeath's asked, barely hiding amusement. G'tor was going to have to ask his dragon how he could recover his calm so quickly. It was a skill more humans aught to have. I am, he said firmly. Just to see if she and Kai are alright. Of course, the brown agreed passively. Are you sure you do not want me to ask Millieth for you? You seem to have trouble with the door.

G'tor scowled and stopped at the door again. I do not! he retorted, but Ruskeath only laughed in his head. Sighing, G'tor finally tapped softly on the door. "Kaegan?" he called uncertainly. "It's only G'tor. You don't have to see me if you don't want to." He swallowed down his nerves and continued. "But are you, Kai, and Millieth alright?" It was a stupid question, he realized, berating himself. How could anyone be alright after all that?

[Tashe]

Kaegan had sent Millieth to the coast with a pair of Selenitas Dragons to blow off steam where no one could be hurt accidentally. Fortunately the two dragons she sent with her were fast (just in case) and strong willed, because it was entirely possible that her Gold would rant and roar and take her anger out on them verbally. The Weyrwoman made sure the dragons knew this before inquiring if they'd accompany her as guards. They'd been gone for a candle mark or so now, hopefully she'd be back soon. Kaegan on the other hand was stuck at the Weyr, wanting to leave for a few days but entirely unable to. Not only because of the Wastelanders, but her duties to the Weyr called for her attention and she couldn't just put them aside. She also had to decide what to do about Caden and how soon she should go about doing it. The longer she didn't run interference between the Goldweyrling, the longer the Wastelanders had to try and influence the girl and her Queen. Even if Caden had been a slave at one point... it didn't mean they couldn't manipulate her.

Wrapping her arms tighter around Kai, Kaegan buried her nose in his clean hair and sighed. She had gotten him back unharmed, he'd been treated well which had been the sole reason she hadn't tried slapping the person who'd brought him to her. She'd fallen asleep last night with the boy in her arms and Soleil curled at the bottom of her bed, the canine having been just as worried as she had. The male basically saw Kai as his new charge, listening to Kaegan only until the boy would be old enough to become the alpha. Now they were sitting on the couch and Kai was sitting patiently in her lap, but he wanted down to play with Shau. The knocking at the door startled the Weyrwoman and she listened to the voice that called out for her.Azaran dropped onto the floor next to the toddler while Dash made an appearance on the woman's shoulder. Setting Kai down, Kaegan left him to play with the feline so she could open the door.

She felt guilty about having snapped at G'tor on the sands, she hadn't meant to sound so angry but it had just come out. He hadn't deserved it, he'd just been concerned about the Dragons, especially his own. Who wouldn't? But perhaps they had both been at fault. The least she could do was invite him in off of her doorstep. Sliding back the lock she swung open the door. "Don't be silly. Please, come in if you'd like." Kaegan stepped aside so he could go past her. "We're fine as can be expected, though I'm a little mentally fatigued myself. Millieth is off releasing her wrath on some poor coastal trees and Kai is well, Kai. How is Ruskeath?"

[Rowana]

G'tor was more than a little surprised when Kaegan opened the door. He blinked at her sheepishly for a moment, more than a little relieved to hear her acting so normal. Realizing he must look silly standing in her doorway, he took a few steps inside. "Thanks," he managed, shifting nervously. She didn't sound angry and she hadn't sent him away. Kai looked alright too. At least the boy had been spared the sight of the dead hatchlings. G'tor was sure that image would haunt his dreams for some time. "Thank goodness," he breathed, unable to keep the relief from his voice. "I feel a bit sorry for those trees though." He could just imagine how they'd look when Millieth was done with them.

"Ruskeath's going to be fine," he answered with a small smile. He was still a bit worried about his dragon. It had been a close call, true, but more than that, Ruskeath had never gotten so angry before. If he lost his temper again when Millieth wasn't around, G'tor wasn't sure he would be able to stop him. "He'll have a little trouble seeing until the swelling is down, but he's lucky it wasn't worse." He bit his lip, remember the scare he'd had and how desperate it had made him. "Listen, I'm sorry about...before," he said, feeling more than a little ridiculous. She probably didn't want to be reminded, but he hadn't had a chance to say it until now. "I shouldn't have shouted at you, I just..." he trailed off sadly, unsure of what else he could say.

[Tashe]

The door swung shut when G'tor cleared its radius, the lock was relatched as well. Before the Wastelanders came Kaegan really had no reason to lock her doors on a regular basis, now she did. It could spell the difference between an attempted attack and a failed one. Too bad she really couldn't do anything about the entrance to her Weyrledge not that it mattered much when Millieth was around, the Golden Queen put all guard canines to shame. "Indeed. I suppose it was either trees or Dragons... and although she would claim Dragons would be more satisfying, we have no shortage of trees around here." Bending down as Soleil came over with his tail erect, Kaegan gave him a command before petting the canine's head to help assure him there wasn't trouble. "I'm glad he will be alright. Millieth will be relieved too. Do you perhaps have word on Behruth's condition?" She tugged gently on the Canine's ear. "That... that whole thing was... a fiasco. For no other sane words to describe it. Millieth is caught between grief, anger at the Wastelanders and anger at herself for not stopping her kin and kith earlier. She hates it when those under her command get hurt because of her. Directly or indirectly."

Crossing over to the couch she'd been sitting on, Kaegan perched herself on the edge of one of the cushions to take the toy that was being offered to her by Kai. The boy got up when Soleil came over, tossing his arms around the male's neck and burying his cheek into the mane of black and white fur. Looking over Soleil's whithers, he watched the Brownrider for a moment before waving at him accompanied by a quiet "hello". Kaegan bounced the stuffed fish between her hands before motioning for G'tor to sit next to her, he didn't have to but standing the whole time probably wouldn't be pleasant. "You were just concerned for Ruskeath. A sudden whiplash of feelings from a Dragon can bleed through the bond no matter how strong or weak it it." She offered the man a small smile. "I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to snap at you like I did, but I had a cacophony of voices in my head and Millieth was so blocked up by rage that it felt like I was trying to bash my way through a cavern wall with my head." A pause, and then, "Thanks though, for putting up with it. Millieth's runoff can be dangerous. It likes to strike and burn as soon as I'm not paying attention." She sat quietly stroking her Salamandyr for a second. "Would you like some tea?"

"Tea is yummy. I drink Mama's when it cool. Like hahzel best, mintymint next best." Kai peeped up from behind Soleil who was large enough for the boy to nearly hide behind. The toddler's mop of curly brown hair shifted as he moved to look at G'tor. He couldn't remember if he'd ever met this guy before, maybe once or twice. He looked familiar sort of... maybe. Either way, Kai had forgotten the man's name. "I Kai, this Soolay." Azaran chirped from his position on the rug. "That Azzie. He mamma's fwit. That Dash on Mamma's shouwder and Scara and Shau are hidin'. Who you 'gain?"

[Rowana]

G'tor knelt down and held his hand out for Soleil to sniff. He shook his head sadly at Kaegan's question. "I'm afraid not. He was stable at least, when we were there, but I don't know how bad it is." He didn't have to say that it probably wasn't good. G'tor found it a small miracle the little brown was alive at all with the wounds he had. "I did hear that the boy, Denvaril, will live," he added with a hopeful smile. Whether the former weyrling wanted to live after loosing his dragon was up to him, but surviving being stabbed was a start. It was small comfort after what had happened.

Slowly, almost hesitantly, G'tor took the seat Kaegan offered. "Millieth shouldn't blame herself," he said quietly. "Without her, it would have been a lot worse for all of us." He smiled and waved to Kai before he went on. "Ruskeath won't say so, but I think he blames himself for not being able to do anything." He shook his head sadly, then turned to meet her eyes. A small smile slowly returned to his face. At least Kaegan wasn't really angry at him. "It was the least I could do. I only wish I'd been able to do more than just stand there." He sighed. "I'd love some tea, though, thank you," he added gratefully.

Ranchan yawned, having grown bored with this discussion. Humans were interesting as a rule, but did they have to talk quite so much? The little human, however, now he seemed to have the right idea. Ranchan peeped and fluttered down to flopped on top of Soleil so she could see Kai more closely. G'tor chuckled and leaned down to address the boy. "Do you now?" he inquired reasonably. "I think I'll take up your recommendation. Pleased to meet you, Kai," he smiled and held out a hand. He'd always liked children. They had such an honest way of looking at things. "That's Ranchan and I think she'd like to play with you. Star and Tervain are keeping Ruskeath company I'm afraid."

[Tashe]

"I hope that Behruth pulls through. He is a hardworking and kind Brown. Loosing M'ta would possibly be..." She rubbed the side of her chin as she searched for the right word. "... detrimental." The Brownrider was a brilliant fighter and was the last remaining member of the Legatus Wing, it would be a loss if they lost him now. Oh well, she knew Millieth wasn't going to be too fond of the news when she came back, but being in a stable condition was better than nothing. "Denvaril. I'm glad he will live. We lost too many at the hatching, I'm relieved I won't have to put his name down on the death records." At the very least, the three teens who survived the culling would be able to start over again... if they chose to. It was fortunate that they lost their Dragons so early on, compared to the unimaginable pain it would have caused them if they had lost them after a year or more of bonding. It was the grim logic that everyone faced.

Kaegan waved her hand dismissively. "I try and comfort her, but she is past looking for it. She bares her responsibility as best she can, but a hot temper mixed with her ability to command weighs her down." She sighed. "She'll pull through. She always does. And anyway Ruskaeth shouldn't blame himself. Even if there had been something he could have done, Millieth and I still would have stopped the fighting as quickly as possible. A full out war is not something we want with the Wastelanders, we wouldn't win and all the freedom I've negotiated with Ja'kin would disappear." The Weyrwoman flicked a piece of lint off of her skirt and returned his smile. "Just being there was help enough. Kinda like an anchor in a tempest." A pause. "I shall get that tea then. Kai, honey, this is G'tor. He's one of mommy's friends." Getting up, she left G'tor to interact with her son while she got the tea ready.

The toddler watched his mother bustle off before looking back at the long haired man. "Yes." He didn't know what the word 'recommendation' meant, but he got the impression the man liked what he had said. Blinking he touched his finger's to G'tor's hand before turning back to Soleil, who was doing everything not to try and shake the creature off of his back. He held out his arm for the Green like he did for Azzie, she was much smaller than the Bronze but flits were always like the Dragons. Too bad his mommy didn't have a mini Milli, that would be cool. "Ranchan? She much smaller than Azzie. Azzie! Say hi to Ranchan." He glanced down at the Bronze who had sat himself by the toddler's foot. Fluttering his wings, the Bronze fluted at the Green in greeting. He'd never met this female before, which was odd seeing as how he was the Flitter King of the Weyr. Being the oldest Bronze obviously gave him that title automatically. Kai's hazel eyes traveled back to G'tor. "You ride dragon? What color? Like Azzie? Or like Dash? Or like Soolay?" Which meant blue, because that was the color of the canine's eyes.

[Rowana]

G'tor nodded solemnly as Kaegan spoke. Too much blame had flown around already. In the end, little had change. They still had Ja'kin for a leader and the war was still looming over them worse than a cloud of Thread. Only now they had the death's of four hatchlings on their hearts. Even with everything the Wastelanders had done so far, G'tor had almost been willing to accept that they were only doing what they thought they must to retake their home. This, however, went too far for him. No matter how supposedly useless they might have been in the future, he refused to believe that murdering children was a solution to anything. Kaegan was right, though. They couldn't go to war in their own Weyr, not now. Like it or not, it looked like Ja'kin and his riders were here to stay. And now they had a new queen to worry about as well. G'tor was really going to need that tea today.

Grateful, G'tor smiled at her again before turning back to Kai. He gently gave the boy's finger a small shake, beaming. At least Kai was still here and still safe. Ranchan, meanwhile, was delighted with the attention. She flicked her head at Azaran, chirping brightly. Then she hoped over onto Kai's arm, thrilled that his little human was so willingly offering himself as a perch. It was so much easier when they did that, instead of her having to hop between shoulders until someone didn't shoo her away. Even for a green, Ranchan was tiny, so she had no trouble crawling up the boy's arm to lick playfully at his ear.

G'tor chuckled at his fire lizard's antics. He listened politely to Kai's question and nodded in agreement. "I do indeed. He's a brown, like Dash," he answered, recalling the salamandyr's color. "His name is Ruskeath. Would you like to meet him sometime? I'm sure he'd love to meet you." Ruskeath loved children, human or dragonkind. Besides, seeing Kai in person might cheer him up. For all the brown acting normal, G'tor had a feeling he was brooding over the events every time he was alone.

[Tashe]

Kai giggled when his ear was licked, happily abandoning his hold on Soleil to stroke Ranchan. Like he was with Azaran and Dash, the toddler pet the Flitter gently so as not to make the female angry. He loved flitters. They were his favorite animals, then doggies and then Runners. He liked those birds that go 'honkhonk' too, but it was hard to remember their name sometimes. Looking back at his mother's friend, Kai nibbled on a corner of his lip. Although he loved Firelizards and Salamandyrs, Dragons were kinda scary. They were so big and he was so small! Even his momma was small when he saw her stand next to them, and she was big! Milli was the biggest of all the Dragons so other Dragons had to be smaller. Kai itched Ranchan's eyeridge as he thought. "Brown like Dash... Dash is nice... Ruskee' nice too? I onwy like nice Dragons... Hok' wasn't soooo nice, but he not mean. I liked Hok' cause he was a pretty blue. Had purpley spotties on him. Miss him a whooole lot..." Kai had cried when his momma had told him that Hokth was gone as well as Aunt 'raina, they were always nice to him. He liked nice people. Ja'kin was nice to him, but his mommy didn't like him. So Kai had many mixed feelings about male riders. He liked female Riders a lot better. "If Ruskee' is nice, I want to meet. Not as big as Milli? Big Dragons are scary kinda..."

Feeding Dash a small piece of dried meat from a jar, Kaegan bound back her hair before letting the Mandyr climb back onto her shoulder. Much love you! Thankiethankie! She ran a finger down the Brown's back. Despite the fact he could make her temporarily take leave of her senses during a chase, she couldn't think of a life without the male. Dash had helped her so much through her life at Selenitas that he had become part of her soul. Picking up the two mugs of tea she wondered back over to the couch and handed one to G'tor. "I hope you don't mind that its Hazel. From what I gathered you were going to request Kai's suggestion. I have other flavors if you don't want it, I can always give it to Kai once it cools down a bit." Like tea hatchling does. Yup. Dash flicked his frill up and down and gnawed on his small strip of food. He liked dried meat as snacks because he got to chew on it.