the deepest secret nobody knows [erilena]

[Avu]

“I really don’t think this is as hard as you’re making it out to be,” Ka’aen sighed. “At all. They’re all Southern and fat, what’s the freaking problem.” His unenthusiastic words, emphasized by a wave of his hand towards the rolling fields full of browsing herdbeast, were received with a quiver of near-imperceptible amusement, quiet indulgence, and the feeling that—“I absolutely do understand,” Ka’aen interrupted, deadpan, “I understand that you’re the pickiest eater on this side of Pern. I understand that you’re trying to pick out a best when there is no best because they’re all good enough for even you. I understand that you’re just doing this to irritate me. I do.”

The blue coiled around one of the trees, long claws languidly dragging through the soil. Such redundancy, he purred, tail flicking out to brush down Ka’aen’s side, What pity it must be to have but not use, such a waste… His voice brushed like a caress, his eyes distantly focused on his next meal, not on Ka’aen, Ka’Love, my only, my soul…if you understand what I seek, what questions can be sought answers? You understand, you say, sound so upset, so terribly impatient. What hurt spears me at such aggravation….feel, your rejection so pains me.

Ka’aen narrowed his eyes. “As if.” His arms, previously folded across his chest at the end of his words, uncurled so he could smack Rhiiseth’s tail casually out of his face. The blue retracted it in mock horror, draped it playfully across his shoulders, pushing down just enough to make Ka’aen’s knees buckle slightly under the weight. “Go eat,” he slipped out from under Rhiiseth’s tail, frowning again. “You haven’t eaten in a week and a half, Rhii. You’ve got to be starving.”

Count a sevenday only, Rhiiseth corrected abstractedly, utterly unconcerned by the incriminating growl his stomach offered. Eyes to the sky, Ka’Mine, what a lovely creature this way comes. Shades of green like water gleams, what unique glamour is hers to bestow upon others as she sees fit. The purr was not quite reverence, but it was definitely interest; such a unique creature indeed. His head tipped up, a croon swelling from his throat in greeting, the blue undulating from around the tree.

Such grace, lovely, sing-song tones directly to Feyrianth, Rhiiseth brushing against her consciousness lightly, What unique vision has dawn left in its wake, a lovely mirage, the perfect waking dream…what name does beauty go by, or shall it remain wreathed in mystery, a glamorous cloak?

Ka’aen turned on his heel in the direction Rhiiseth was looking, a quizzical tilt of his head betraying his interest in the green and her Rider, “You mean she has four wings.” Clearly Rhiiseth had the eloquence of the two—Ka’aen didn’t see why he should waste words. “Huh.” A blink, “She flies well. Guess you get used to it if you’ve always had them. Are you flirting? Stop flirting. Go eat. You eat like a starved canine, she’ll probably be totally put off by your horrible appetite. Hello, greenrider.”

[Rei]

Feyrianth tilted her wings and slowly looped around an uprising column of warm air. Forsaking riding it to instead dance around it with quick flutters. Fast and tight her movements may not be but they where graceful, smooth, and precise and no one could deny her that. Erilena tapped the green hide beneath her bare feet. You are in high spirits this afternoon. Why not? The sun is warm, the wind lovely under my wings and I am going to eat. What is there not to be happy about? The blonde upon her back gave a light smile. Nothing I suppose. Although in truth the greenrider could currently come up with many things if she wanted. But what was the point? Her green deserved to be happy and if she let a little of it bleed over onto her who could blame her?

Erilena missed her family. Her friends. The old way things had been. The infirmary work helped. Gave her something to focus on and do. But the greenrider missed the days where she could just laugh and gossip with Nephele, or go bother K’sel and poke in play at his manner of appearance, or even simply kind of sort of find an silly excuse to talk to R’ven at drills. She missed not having to worry about dancing alone by herself. Dancing in her weyr was not the same. Erilena missed the moonlight. The caressing cold of the rain.

Wrinkling her nose against her thoughts she pushed them from her mind with a simple whispered wish that those she loved and cared for where safe and at least content where they currently where. If they where still alive at all….. Feyrianth beneath her crooned soft and caressingly. They are fine. Trilbrother is strong. Pettafriend is wise, and Nuothlove is so skilled in the air. I have faith that they will one day return. Blinking tears from her eyes Erilena smiled. You’re right. I know you are. It's just sometimes hard. Faith. You have to believe. That’s why they call it faith. We’ll in turn do our best to survive until that day comes. The green below her twirled once more as she brushed her bonded’s mind in affirmative. Setting her wings into a glide toward the feeding pens Feyrianth titled her head to view the ground as a sing song voice addressed her.

Whirling eyes fixed on the blue and she suddenly shot forward into a series of quick light fluttering movements. Erilena gave a small squeak and tightened her grip. What are you doing Fey? The green gave a croon and addressed the blue below, her voice light and playful, as she also included hers in the words in an answer to her rider's question. You flatter me. Her eyes indeed whirled with a touch of pink before falling back into calm blue green. The little show however had been purely playful and a gift for his lovely words. Feyrianth I am called. If beauty does have a name I doubt it would be mine but you are very nice for saying so. Turning gracefully she glided towards the bluepair and back winged to a complete stall before gracefully landing. You must surely have a lovely name as well? As the green spoke she crouched to allow hers an easy dismount, the woman giving her dragon a half surprised look before turning to the bluepair. Did Fey have to be so nice to everyone they happened to meet?

The blonde turned hazel eyes to the blue’s rider. Who was shouting at his dragon? She had never seen him before and although he now wore the same colors Erilena herself was made to wear she was pretty sure she knew where he was from. His dragon’s hide was memorable enough that had he lived in the weyr before she would have remembered him. Pushing her hair back from her face she nevertheless gave the rider a polite nod even if the politeness didn’t quite reach her eyes. Hello greenrider? Well wasn’t that a nice greeting. Swallowing a surge of momentarily irritation at the way she was addressed, (Was it that difficult to just say hello and ask for a name?) she have a short head bob in greeting. “Hello.” It was sooooo tempting to add ‘bluerider’. But he clearly ranked her and Erilena never had been one to stir up trouble. Instead she made a shooing motion at Fey. “Go on love eat.” The faster she ate the faster they could leave.

Crooning to Rhiiseth Feyrianth fluttered her four wings. You do not mind sharing the feeding pens with me? Perhaps she would let him go first yes? That was polite.

[Avu]

Oh, she was willing to play. Rhiiseth’s tongue flashed out in amusement at the green’s maneuvers, ones that he fancied for his words. So kind of her to respond so nicely; surely some creatures would take offense at being addressed by him. His eyes half-lidded, Rhiiseth purring low in his throat at her response. Feyrianth, he repeated, rolling the R in her name into a hum, A rose by any other name, and yet it slips like silk. Fitting. The blue’s eyes followed Feyrianth’s descent and landing, Rhiiseth, they call me, and then more playfully, eyes gleaming green-blue, Star dancer, dream weaver, eclipse the sun and spill the seas…

Ka’aen rolled his eyes absently as Rhiiseth’s voice rolled like an echo through his mind, leaning against the fence pens after another dip of his chin, a half-nod, at Erilena—any green Rhiiseth decided to flirt with he automatically crossed their Riders off of his potential one-night-stands list. At least, until Rhiiseth got bored of them. The blue would probably Chase, so he’d get there anyway, if in a kind of roundabout fashion, and there was no sense in ruining Rhiiseth’s chances. Still, he dipped his head at Feyrianth, murmuring lightly, and if he noticed the shortness of Erilena’s response he gave no indication, “She’s pretty, your Feyrianth. Looks nicer flying than most dragons.”

He left it open-ended on purpose—if Erilena wanted to take that as indication to the extra set of wings, so be it. But he didn’t know if she saw that as a handicap or not and it was better not to speak of it like it was. Ka’aen considered it one—dragons were meant to have two wings, not four, never four—but then, he was Benden-bred.

O lovely, murmured like dusk, What is mine is yours; I should share the skies and stars, the moon to match in beauty, the sun to shine approval. Do not trouble yourself on my behalf. Lips pulled back, teeth flashing palely white in the sunlight, a startlingly human smile with a flick of tongue across Rhiiseth’s muzzle, the blue’s tail coiling around the nearest fence post; he hopped lightly into the pens, wings settling along his spine, Ladies first. He settled in to wait at the end of the pen, one wing lazily gesturing for Feyrianth to go ahead and take her pick—there were no good ones he was worried about her taking anyway.

In the meantime, he would amuse himself with her Rider. Would the little blondie dance for him too? Such emotion in thy eyes, what troubles break like dawn…surely there is light to love and live. His claws slid smoothly across the grass, head tilted quizzically down at Erilena.

“Hnn,” Ka’aen sighed. “Rhii likes to talk to everyone that has a heartbeat. If he’s confusing you can ignore him, he’s probably used to it by now. I think he mostly just likes to hear himself.”

[Rei]

Feyrianth crooned softly to the blue her eyes whirling in playful and pleasant shades. Bouncing lightly forward on her feet the four winged green approached boldly closer to the uniquely marked male. His pronunciation of her name intrigued her. He made it sound... So pretty. Rhiiseth. Her pronunciation was playful, even if she didn’t purr like the did. Your name fits you as well. Star dancer indeed. Your hide reminds me of the night sky. I find it very lovely and your words prettier still. Her tone was genuinely happy. Feyrianth rarely met a dragon she didn’t like but there where a few she found more memorable and special than others. Those she actually claimed and those select few where gifted with her undying devotion, love, and protection. Rhiiseth had not yet earned such. But it seemed he was well on his way to being viewed as a favorite at the very least.

Erilena blinked at Feyrianth her eyes automatically searching her dragon’s hide for any type of glow. But no. Not proddy. Simply lonely and this one so nice. The greenrider was still reserving judgment on the bluepair. Pretty words where easy to voice after all. The blonde turned to Ka’aen as he spoke. A small smile at his words. “Oh I agree. She’s beautiful.” There was a touch of pride in the words as Erilena made her way closer to the fence and thus the man as well. Crossing her arms over the top rail the woman looked sidewise at the bluerider. “She’s a lot smoother in flight than most. Wonderful to ride.” Intentionally she refused to mention that that was likely due to her dragon’s ‘handicap’. There where things Feyrianth could do with four wings that a dragon with two would not be capable of. Anyway the pair where out to prove themselves useful. Hence a positive attitude, although hard to keep all the time, she learned was pretty much necessary. “Feyrianth tells me your blue’s name is Rhiiseth? His hide is simply beautiful. Very unique.” It reminded her of the sky at night. One of her favorite things and the compliment came almost automatically. No she did not like the Wastelanders. But Erilena had never been one to be intentionally rude to anyone. If they where to be forced to interact, politeness always helped.

Behind the greenrider her green gave a chirp and then playfully spread her wings and dipped her front half in the mimic of a curtsy. Playfully Feyrianth responded to the dark blue. So generous kind dancer of the night sky. Hopping forward she leapt the fence and then from there took to wing. The four winged dragon much preferred to hunt from the air. It made the kill easier and then there was no need to run the poor herd ragged. Powering upwards she made a lazy circle as she picked out a target.

Playfully the green brushed against Rhiiseth’s mind, the then flipped backwards. Snapping her double pair of wings shut Feyrianth plummeted towards her target. Falling past the collision danger zone she suddenly snapped open her double pair of wings, stalling movement even as her back talons struck out and snapped the back of her intended target. A few lazy seemingly effortless flaps had the green touching down gently on her kill, the rest of the herd galloping away in fear.

Her head swung low over her food, tongue darting out to touch against the dead herdbeast’s flank. The kill was quick, neat, and without any unnecessary violence. Grabbing it by the throat Feyrianth pranced closer to the fence line with her kill like a proud feline. As she went she addressed the newly met blue with a playful. Your turn Rhiiseth~ Politely she dropped her kill and turned her attention towards the dark male. She would not start feeding until he to had made his own kill.

Erilena watched Feyrianth take to wing with a smile before Rhiiseth spoke to her and she titled her head up to view the other dragon, a surprised expression crossing her face. Yes Erilena had lived at the weyr for awhile but, even so, she had not had many dragon’s address her directly. Hardly any at all actually. In fact she could probably count the number of dragons besides Feyrianth that had spoken to her on one hand. Rhiiseth’s voice was different than her green’s. Where Feyrianth’s was sweet, airy, and almost bell like the blue’s was silky, almost caressing in a way. It made a shiver go down her spine and the greenrider wasn’t entirely sure it was a pleasant shiver. The woman was silent until Ka’aen had finished speaking and then she nodded and gave him a small knowing smile. “Oh don’t worry. Feyrianth is the exact same way. She talks to almost everyone. She’s not shy in the least.” Looking back up at the blue dragon she gave him a curious look. Erilena liked to interact with draconics. Of any type really. Well baring mandyrs. But dragons, whers, and fire lizards she almost preferred to humans at times.

“Light to love and live? Yes I’d say so. I have light in my life. But sometimes light is hard to find isn’t it? Hidden in darkness waiting to be found?” The blue was just as confusing as some mandyrs could be in terms of speech. But Rhiiseth’s tone hadn’t seemed condescending. Merely curious perhaps? Erilena wasn’t sure she had even answered what the blue was asking. Nor even if his words where voiced in question, but she replied anyway even giving the dragon a soft smile and a wiggling of her fingers.

[Avu]

What generosity would I not extend to thee, murmured like an afterthought, Rhiiseth coiling like a tunnelsnake. His eyes gleamed blue-green, watching the green’s hunting. His own wings twitched curiously; what it would feel like to have an extra set of wings, to feel the wind beneath double the membrane. The tips of his wings folded against his sides, the blue’s head dipping in quiet respect to Feyrianth’s kill, Beautiful devastation, a taste of ruby death so shockingly sweet…I am, his eyes half-closed, head dipping again, Impressed. A quiet glance snuck sideways at Ka’His, a touch of amused yellows bleeding into his gaze—hadn’t he said.

“He’d be the first to agree,” Ka’aen replied amicably, cheerfully ignoring Rhiiseth’s looks. The bluerider turned, leaning his back against the fence and hooking his elbows over the topmost post, legs crossed idly at the ankle, head tipped back and sideways to peer at Erilena. “It’s funny, how everyone says dragons are so picky, don’t you think—not that many’ve talked to me or anything, but Rhii’ll chat up random Candidates when he’s bored and they turn funny colors and stammer all over the place. He thinks it’s funny—but Feyrianth seems a bit too sweet to think that’s amusing, I guess.” The words were thoughtful, casual; Ka’aen didn’t ever go much out of his way for conversation but she was there, so why not.

The blue’s eyes slitted at the green’s invitation, before one powerful leap had Rhiiseth curling around a wind. Didn’t waste any more time being picky—he dropped to snag a herdbeast effortlessly from the herd, claws tightening immediately to snap the spine. Spiraled in to land, head finally tilting back towards Erilena, a quick glance darted towards Feyrianth like he was asking permission, Human concepts; what is love without heartbreak and life without death? His head lowered, claws slipping across the herdbeast’s fur, Appreciate what no longer thrives, follow not fading light but create new…the sun burns ever-bright with its /own/ flames, the moon glows with its /own/ luminescence.

His words had been including Feyrianth; Rhiiseth didn’t believe in excluding people from conversations, ever. Now the blue’s head turned, words turning melodic for the green; she’d said she liked his words, hadn’t she—Danced through the stars, I have, breathe life into stillness and shadow, drawn sorrow from forgotten ghosts. The soft hiss-whisper of his voice melted into a low hum in his throat, Surviving and living are not synonymous. Would be a pity to see such grace and life fade into shades of gray, what beauty thrives in color.

It probably said much for Rhiiseth’s typical eloquence that Ka’aen didn’t so much as bat an eye at the veritable speech—he was used to Rhiiseth waxing poetic at rather random inconvenient moments. He merely quirked an eyebrow at Rhiiseth when he knew he’d caught the blue’s eye, and a gleam of blue amusement flickered through the liquid gaze before the dragon’s head dipped to nudge at the herdbeast. Right. Eating.

[Rei]

Feyrianth half turned toward the blue as Rhiiseth spoke. Her head dipping closer to her kill at his words, embarrassed shades whirling through her liquid eyes before the color faded back to blue. The green was not used to such compliments and though they where very welcome they made her feel…different. One forepaw came up to hook into her meal pulling it closer as Feyrianth coiled her tail around her haunches and turned her gaze skyward to follow the blue’s movements. Thank you.

Erilena blinked at Ka’aen and gave him a small smile. At least he was friendly enough. That made it a bit easier and his blue? Well he was being so horrible sweet to Feyrianth and that was….really, really, appreciated. The four winged green has been feeling distinctly out of place as of late and Rhiiseth was helping to bring her back into better cheer. It was almost comforting. Brushing a few bangs back from her face the greenrider giggled. The mental image of stuttering candidates was an amusing one. She herself had been one of those who nearly gaped in surprise the first time a dragon addressed her. “Can’t say I’ve been bespoken by many either. Rhiiseth is the first to speak to me directly in a long time. I agree though sometimes I’d almost prefer Feyrianth was a bit more picky. She’s not though, but she’s so genuinely cheerful that once they get over the shock of hearing her voice most of them get used to her. I don’t think she speaks to them to amuse herself. I just think she’d genuinely prefers that everyone be her friend and that everyone gets along. Fighting makes her…uncomfortable.” Well made both of them uncomfortable really. Something the green pair had in common. Both hated war.

Before the greenrider could come up with another topic however Rhiiseth was speaking to her again and Erilena looked over at the blue. Her light hazel eyes for a moment remained unfocused in concentration. Then blinking she turned back to Ka’aen. “Er…does he always speak like that? I mean I can understand him to a point but it’s like trying to pick apart a poem or something.” Certainly pretty but also a tad confusing until you actually worked back on what he was saying. Realizing that she might be coming across as slightly rude Erilena quickly continued. “I mean it’s interesting is all. Just something I noticed. Nice of him actually to uh give advice?” Certainly sounded like advice anyway.

Feyrianth in turn crooned sweetly to Rhiiseth, her talons neatly cutting into her meal. Shades of grey are less pretty I agree. Colorful life can be when one chooses to make it so. She returned in a singsong. An attempt to playfully return his near perfect projection. With a rumble the green dipped her head to lap at a bit of the now welling blood. You say it so much better than I. She offered in amusement before tugging at her beast’s hide. Hunger took over then and Feyrinath stopped speaking in favor of neatly starting in on her meal, talons raking across the herdbeast’s abdomen to pull out the more preferred parts.

Erilena wrinkled her nose at the sight and turned back to Ka’aen. “I know she eats much neater than most but even so, watching her still gives me chills sometimes. I don’t know why either. I see worse at the infirmary. Much worse at times and that doesn’t really bother me. Maybe it’s just because it’s Feyrianth. I don’t know.” The woman fell quiet then. Questions circled in her mind. Things she could ask. But somehow she just stubbornly couldn’t bring herself to do such. He was…wasteland and that was supposed to make him bad. But…just like Ba’sun, he didn’t seem bad at all. Hazel eyes flicked back to the bluerider appraising him again. Nothing ever could be easy could it?

[Avu]

Cute. Ka’aen bowed his head at Erilena’s words, a small smile quirking the corners of his lips. Figured; unique enough to catch Rhiiseth’s attention, sweet enough to hold it. The blue was hardly as kind as his pretty words made him to be, but most of the time he didn’t actively display the darkness that could be. Mostly he just preferred to linger with kinder company, the sweet, the naïve, the innocent and untouched…some kind of fascination, probably; so pure that the dragon couldn’t help but to coax the puppet strings around his own claws to make them dance to his tune, see how this string made them twitch. His hands clasped loosely around his midriff, a sideways glance towards the green, idly considering.

“Ah, yeah, he’s always like that,” he replied, amusement catching in laughter in his throat. “Has been since he Hatched—you know, most hatchlings’ll say ‘I’m hungry, get me food’, Rhii goes, what’d he say—‘feel, we touch, and does the world not exhale in relief, slow its spinning in awe, for we are beautiful together.’ Right out of the shell, like, ego much?” Ka’aen tilted his head at Rhiiseth, thoughtfully, and added, “I guess that was advice. Just, a really convoluted way of saying cheer up? I don’t know. Goes over my head half the time too.” Most of the time he got the general gist of whatever the blue decided was prudent to inform him of, but Ka’aen blamed their bond for that—he’d never been poetic before Rhiiseth and just the words would get nowhere.

Rhiiseth dipped his head in amusement at the singsong tone the green took, the flow of her words. An attempt at his own melodic speech? Probably, and ever so delighted with it was Rhiiseth. The blue purred, a low throaty sound, dipping his head to drag his teeth down the herdbeast’s sides, slicing red ribbons of the hide. His tongue flicked out to lap lightly at the tinge of metallic blood, Smoothness of tongue drifts from thy mind. I am sure, sun-maker, because it seemed to fit, didn’t it, That worlds have inhaled in awe at your light. The blue’s head tilted, teeth peeling back a strip of meat, dripping blood. Sun-maker, dream-catcher, of gleaming wind and wings…

Eyes quietly amused; the blue’s wings drifted open to demonstrate, She who paints colors into the sky need not the silver tongue to capture imagination. There was no offense intended in the blue’s quiet delivery; he had long ago come to the conclusion that most dragons didn’t, couldn’t, talk the way he did and that was okay. He appreciated it when they tried.

“You’re a Healer?” That was the only part Ka’aen really latched onto. He’d gotten over draconic eating habits a long time ago. Rhiiseth wasn’t neat but some of his clutchsiblings had been downright rabid about eating. It’d passed. “You were okay, weren’t you—they were told not to hurt the Healers,” which mostly explained what he was talking about, exactly; Ka’aen didn’t particularly know what to call it. Victory, he guessed, though he was sure the girl’d bristle at that. Actually, she’d probably bristle even at the question, like it was offensive to be reminded or something, but…well, the sooner she was familiar with it, the sooner she’d get over it, right?

[Rei]

Erilena smiled and leaned closer to Ka’aen. Impression talk. It was a safe topic and it let her speak about Feyrianth. Who was always a pleasant topic. Not surprising considering she was biased. Giggling and hiding it behind her hand the greenrider turned to catch sight of Rhiiseth. “Well he’s still a real charmer. I don’t know about ego. But Fey really likes him already.” Not that that was saying much. The green really did like everyone but she did have favorites. One of which was Trilaranth and the brown had his share of ego too. Not that that bothered Feyrianth in the least. No if anything it just made her adore her brother all the more. Trilbrother was so positive and confident according to her green, and if the dragon valued anything it was a positive attitude. Something the female had in spades.

A small smile lit her face. “When Feyrianth hatched her first words to me where. ‘You smell good. Smell like soil.’ Then something about eating, like you said most hatchlings say. I fell on my way to the hatching sands and she was referring to the dirt smudges I had on my robes. I can be a horrible klutz at times.” As Erilena spoke the smile had gotten wider and she turned to the bluerider and gave a short humorous laugh. “Funny how we all get all sentimental about them isn’t it? I mean every hatching since then it replays in my head. I remember squealing like an undignified little girl too.” Shaking her head at herself she leaned back against the fence and smiled in Feyrianth’s direction pretty much oozing love for the dragon who passed the feeling back enthusiastically.

“Well your Rhiiseth is very nice to offer me advice.” Cheer up hmm? Well that was hard when you missed so very many people. Those who where and had been closest to her in her life had been neatly ripped away, and that was that. One day they where there the other poof. So many things left unsaid, undone, and to think she may never get the chance to say and do those thing was…depressing. For example R’ven. The last time Erilena had had an actual conversation with him it had gone so badly and now she’d maybe never get the chance to even try and repair that at all. Holding onto the hope that she’d see K’sel, Nephele, and R’ven again one day helped but it didn’t heal it. Only time might help that. Maybe…

Feyrianth gingerly picked the liver out of her kill and tipping her head back neatly swallowed it. Rhiiseth’s words had her head turning to look at him, her tongue darting out to clean any blood off her muzzle. The dragon’s blue eyes brightened a shade at his words and she practically pranced in place flinging her wings outwards in excitement. Moving so the sun best highlighted the near metallic spots on her hide Feyrianth spoke in a playful and slightly amused tone. Sun-maker. You flatter me but I will wear your nickname with pride Star dancer. Oh yes she had not forgotten his self given title and it fit. Like the day and night we are yes? The green politely dipped her head and then lowered it back to her meal, tearing a strip of meat off to swallow that as well, her eyes still fixed on the darkly colored blue. Her wings twitched at the next words and the female purposely slow flared them as she had seen the flutterbyes do on summer days. Sky painting is fun. He of the silver tongue should join me sometime in dance. Show me how the stars dance and I will show you how the sun shines~ Her eyes whirled faster in excitement at that. Perhaps he would play her sky games as the others used to?

Erilena titled her head at Ka’aen’s question and then gave a light nod. “Yes. I’m really close to becoming a senior apprentice in dragon healing now. Healing humans I am a little behind but the basics are close to each other. Anatomy and such is obviously different but…” She trailed off as the bluerider continued and gave a soft and sad smile. Briefly looking back at Feyrianth the greenrider gave a shrug. “Sure. I guess I was okay. I didn’t get wounded. But some of those I knew did. Some of them died. Others disappeared without a trace. I lost a lot of people.” Some of those the woman had been closest to in the weyr in fact. “So I guess yes and no is the best answer to your question. I was hurt. Just not physically.” Worrying her bottom lip she swallowed and when she spoke next her voice was stronger and less sad in tone. “There was a enough clean up work for us after you all came along anyway. Helped with the transition I guess. Hard to dwell on petty things when people and dragons are hurting and dying around you.”

[Avu]

The bluerider laughed, head tipping back, at Erilena’s response, her Impression story. So easy to get people to open up with that (Rhiiseth had pointed it out once—look at how their faces glow when you speak of it, look at how they smile and how they talk, look at how they love). His arms draped loosely across his abdomen, eyes crinkling at the corners as he flicked a grin at the greenrider. Squealed like a little girl, had she? At least he hadn’t done that—Ka’aen remembered dropping to his knees in front of Rhiiseth, hands trembling as he stroked down the hatchling’s spine, pressing his face against still-damp hide and inhaling until he was dizzy, repeating after Rhiiseth like it was a lifeline, we are beautiful. we are. we are, fiercely believing.

He let silence flicker a moment as the greenrider went on, though. Healing was not Impression; the ground between them here was yet to be tested, still unstable and rocky. Ka’aen let his head drop against his chest, eyes flicking away from Erilena. “I’m sorry,” knowing he opened himself up for attack there, because it couldn’t be right to bottle it up and wasn’t that what pushing it all aside did, and it had to all come out some where and some time and it was probably better out here, away from everyone, everything, than in there during Wing Drills or some such. But—“I’ve never liked it, hurting people,” he said, eventually, “’S just been necessary, most of the time. I am sorry.”

He didn’t say, If they didn’t fight they’d be okay.

Didn’t say, Some of ours died, too.

Didn’t say, I’ve loved the dead before, too.

Some of it was cruel, some of it too close and too raw to mention, now or ever. But what was said—well, he’d just hope it was enough. They weren’t supposed to be Selenitas and Wasteland; they were supposed to be one. The gaps had to be bridged sometime, somehow.

He spoke in between bites, even though ‘speaking’ didn’t require his mouth; it felt rude to talk while eating, in any case. Claws passed through the dead creature’s ribs, spilling organs and intestines to the ground, paws kneading the tissue to stem the bleeding until he could suck the blood. Day and night, Rhiiseth echoed on a smoky purr, Both burn with their own glory. His eyes narrowed, smoothing over the green’s hide, a visual touch, And without the other, neither can exist…what is day without night to follow; night without day to shatter the dark?

The flash of her wings—Rhiiseth hummed soft appreciation. An eclipse, the blue murmured, When day and night control the world as one. He crooned, a musical counterpoint to the words, Teach me to draw clouds into the sky, teach me to become the wind, the sun, the dawn and break of day, and I will teach you the night-melody. His tail coiled, uncoiled, I will teach you the beauty of silence and darkness, the thousand shades of gray. I will teach you how to hear the stars when they sing, the moon when she smiles. I will, sun-maker, if you wish it.

[Rei]

Although she had done a good job of hiding it Ka’aen’s laugh had startled Erilena a little bit. It was more the suddenness of it than anything else, and although she did return the gesture with a smile it was still guarded. No matter how friendly he was being at the moment the bluerider still was from Wasteland. Yes technically they where supposedly all going to be wasteland now. Or maybe all Selenitas. Whatever they decided to call them it didn’t matter. The greenrider wasn’t too keen on suddenly just up and accepting all of them as comrades, neighbors and what have you. Instead she was choosing to examine them on a case by case basis. Maybe if she thought of them as just people and not Wastelanders it would be easier. Maybe. In any case the woman was still having a hard time trusting them and hell if she was going to totally open up to the first one who was nice enough to engage her in conversation, no matter how sweet his dragon was being to her Feyrianth. Yes Ka’aen seemed nice enough. But one simple conversation didn’t tell much.

The silence that followed her words wasn’t unwelcome and Erilena found her gaze straying to the two dragons. It was hard to tell if Feyrianth was outright flirting or not at this point. She could just be being overly friendly. However it had been awhile since her dragon’s first rise. In fact Feyrianth should have risen again by now but she hadn’t. Probably due to stress. Both Erilena’s and her own. Which meant now that things where less stressful…. Yeah. Probably best to just ignore that for now. Especially since the man next to her had just spoken again. His words caused the greenrider to drag her lip between her teeth to keep herself from speaking. Just what was he apologizing for? Light hazel eyes flicked to Ka’aen but the bluerider wasn’t looking at her. The woman was a bit lost. How was she supposed to respond to that? It would be a lie to tell him it was okay. That she forgave them. Forgiveness was easy for her but in some ways this whole thing was hard for her to forgive. And something he had said, or maybe it was the way he had phrased it had bothered her. Most of the time it had been necessary? What about the times when it hadn’t been?

Finally Erilena found her tongue but she wasn’t sure that what came out was right to say. Or even if it was okay for her to say it. Really though did it matter? “You can apologize if you want but I’m not even sure what you’re apologizing for. Kind of makes it hard to forgive you for anything. You where just following orders weren’t you?” She set her crossed arms on the top rail of the fence and looked out at the dragons. “I’m not naive enough to believe that hurting someone is never necessary. I know there are situations where it can’t be helped. Still…. I don’t understand why the children had to die. I don’t understand why the other gold riders had to die. I don’t understand a lot of things and losing the people I loved hasn’t made it any easier. If you don’t like hurting people then why do you do it? Because someone told you to? I just don’t understand that logic I guess. If you know it was wrong, why do it? Everyone has a choice. There where always choices.” Except some people would argue that there weren’t always choices. In all honesty the greenrider wasn’t sure whether that was true or not.

Feyrianth daintily ate her meal, her attention flicking between Rhiiseth and the beast at her feet. It was hard to be polite when one was eating she noted but she did her best, her eyes locking on the blue’s and a soft croon or two leaving her throat to let him know that she was playing attention. His words caused excitement to whirl into the green’s gaze. So pretty he spoke, and with such emotion. Silver tongue did fit him. There was something someone had told her about such things once. But it was only a vague memory and more Erilena’s then her own. In all honesty Feyrianth was too excited by the darkly colored blue’s attention to think of anything besides that anyway. A lot of the other wasteland dragons preferred not to speak to her at all. But this one called her beautiful. Spoke to her. Interacted. Yes the prospect of having another friend excited Feyrianth. It never crossed her mind to be afraid or nervous around Rhiiseth. At all.

Tilting her head the green licked some blood off her muzzle and gave a soft trill to his words. Oh I do wish it. Very much. I will show you the beauty of the sun, how to dance in it’s rays. There is much I can teach you of the light Star dancer. I look forward to your lessons as well. For you speak truth. What is the light without the dark and vise versa. Both must exist. And both had their own charms surely. Hers loved the moon as much as she loved the sun. Both where lovely in their own right. Excitement colored the female’s tone and she barely restrained herself from reaching forward to nudge softly at the male’s shoulder. Instead Feyrianth curbed the movement and dropped her head to gnaw at a bone, cracking it to get at the marrow inside. Not sure she was if the blue liked physical touch and the green wasn’t the type to push such things unless she was positive it would be well received.

[Avu]

“Blindly following orders,” a wry smile tugging the corners of his lips upward, “is the most pathetic excuse ever. If I ever use it, seriously, kill me.” Ka’aen leaned against the fence, the wooden post pressing into his abdomen just below his ribs, pressed his fingertips against the roughness of the unsanded surface. “I mean, for some people, maybe. Other people just like it. It’s just—I mean, what it comes down to, I think, is—” He stuttered to a stop, frowning as he tried to put the thoughts into words, and then huffed an apologetic laugh. “Rhii’s always been the more articulate. It’s like—imagine you had a kid, right?” He made a gesture, to indicate a height of about three feet—small, but past infancy and the early childhood.

“You’d love him.” The words were voiced with quiet certainty. Mothers loved their children. There were exceptions, but Erilena was…she would. Had to. If she didn’t, Ka’aen didn’t know who would. May not actively want a child, but if she had one…although, he supposed, it was possible she did have one, already. “You’d fight for him, wouldn’t you, protect him if someone tried to hurt him.” It was phrased as a question, but had no upturn at the end to indicate it was anything but rhetorical, “Keep him from getting nightmares if you could, give him advice even if you knew he wouldn’t follow it.” One eyebrow quirked like a question mark. “You’d die for him, if it came to that, wouldn’t you.”

Mothers did. Maybe not his mother; maybe not some mothers—but good mothers. Ones that cared, loved their children; they would. “Would you kill for him?” His eyes flicked up to Erilena. “If you had something worth dying for, would you kill for it, too?” The smile was sardonic, now. “So. I’m sorry for caring so much, about the war. I guess. Don’t know if it’s comparable to motherhood, given,” he gestured at his body with a small ironic snort. “But I figure that’s just the strongest example of love there is, isn’t it. And it’s like—once you’re there, if someone said that they could help you, if you threw in your lot with them…wouldn’t you?” He didn’t know, not really, why apologizing was so important, but it was. Not just the words, but the understanding. A reaction.

Any reaction.

Rhiiseth nearly preened. And Feyrianth—she spoke so sweetly now, perhaps a mirror of his own words? There was no greater compliment. Much indeed… purred quiet, contemplative, Pray tell, song-dancer, does the sun wink in the river like the moon and stars, paint the waters silver, turn the sea dark and silent? His teeth slashed into the herdbeast’s gutted frame like punctuation. Fit each of the sea’s moods like its own…make peace with the lonely wind, the gentle breeze, the howling gust, all?

He had not promised, had he, to not convince her the night was ever more beautiful than the day. And it was; peaceful, quieter. Dangerous. Everything looked calm, reflective, simple, in the daylight; it had ever so many more layers in the night.

[Rei]

Eyes flicking back to Ka’aen Erilena remained silent. Oh she could have interrupted, maybe, but she chose not to. Instead she let the bluerider speak, her gaze remaining fixed on him. His first words didn’t really surprise her but she did slightly raise one eyebrow. Kill him? Yes it was a figure of speech but the greenrider had to fight against making a face in response anyway. Did she look capable of killing anyone? Furthermore she was a healer. Healers tried to save life not destroy it. When the man leaned against the fence the woman turned her gaze partway back to the dragons but kept her full attention on Ka’aen. Tongue tied. Hmm how had she managed that one? Erilena almost found herself amused at his stuttering. Normally she was the one grasping for words not the other way around.

The greenrider’s eyes slightly widened as he began his explanation. Imagine she had child? Well really that wasn’t so hard to do. Take Ca’tauri for example. Erilena could probably imagine the cat was her child if she half tried. Maybe in ways she already did count the feline as a child of hers. A four footed one, but one nonetheless. So yes his questions all got resounding a resounding yes. Really was there anything she wouldn’t do to protect her child if she had one? It was all rhetorical really. Because no, the greenrider didn’t have a flesh and blood child but she knew some who did and yes, they did their best to keep them from harm. Still what did that have to do with war? As Ka’aen continued her eyes flicked from the dragons and to him, the expression in them almost unreadable.

For a long moment Erilena remained silent, taking his words in and turning them over in her head. It was a lot to think about and to be honest could she say she was sure what she would do? It was hard to tell unless one got into that situation in the first place wasn’t it? What would the greenrider do if it was her life or theirs? Would she be able to kill someone to protect someone that she loved? R’ven. Given a choice would she die for him? Dmitri? K’sel? Nephele? Would she be willing to die to prevent their deaths as well? A child? Would she die to protect it? In all honesty….she probably would. At least for a few of them, and yes probably most certainly for a child especially if it was her own.

It was a hard thing to think about though. Swallowing she finally spoke. “There are people in my life I think I would die for. Some with more certainty than others. So I guess if you are doing it to protect them… I can understand a little. But that doesn’t make it any easier to accept this war. If you are fighting to protect the people you love that’s one thing. But the war started over a stupid batch of eggs. Eggs that went on to hatch and impress. I don’t understand why it all has to continue. Why some sort of understanding can’t be met after so many years. If the fighting keeps going on then more people will die. More people you love will be in danger, and the circle starts all over again.” Her fingers tapped against her arm. “I know your weyr is trying to get Benden back for themselves. But I don’t understand why you have to take over our home and put our families in danger to do that. In a way, what’s happening now to Selenitas…. is it really any different than what J’lorin did to you?”

Perhaps Erilena was treading on a dangerous topic. But so much of this had haunted her thoughts for the past sevendays that it had to be said to someone. Even if the someone was the Wastelander next to her. He had asked hadn’t he?

Feyrianth crooned softly at his words her wings rising up slowly and flaring outwards as if reaching for the sky above. No the sun cannot do the things you mention. But can the moon warm with it’s rays? Can it coax life from the ground? Cut it through the fury of a storm to create a rainbow of color in the sky? Caress the clouds with golden light? No it cannot. The sun burns with a fire that cannot be extinguished. A soft croon voiced to her companion. Just as the moon holds it’s own power over the realm of the night so to does the sun hold power over the realm of the day. I will be glad to learn the beauty of the night Star dancer. But you must also be open to the beauty of the light of day. A purr followed her words as her tail raised to briefly flick across the underside of his jaw.

Then as if the touch never happened at all Feyrianth went back to the kill at her feet, picking at what was left of the remains. Her whirling eyes flicked back to hers momentarily. A thin worried line of color whirling though her faceted eyes before she banished it. Head coming up from the remains of her meal the green flicked her wings closed against her spine and sat on her haunches, raising one taloned forepaw to clean it.

[Avu]

She was quiet, and in that moment the vague memory of a boy resurfaced. Yeah, speaking of children…Kaier. Wondered how he was—had to be old enough to know of his mother’s death by now, his father’s betrayal. It’d been Turns. Seeing him would be like seeing a stranger with a familiar face. Ka’aen scuffed his foot against the grass, eyebrows drawing together. He’d see the kid when they got back to Benden, was all. It’d be a long absence, but there’d be time to smooth that over, later. There would have to be; it wasn’t like he could go back and fix everything now. Poor kid, though, with a droll kind of self-loathing, avoided by his father because he was the spitting image of his mother, even as a child, even as a boy.

His gaze had fallen, dark and only vaguely fascinated by the seep of blood against grass, to Rhiiseth’s meal, the slash of teeth against the herdbeast’s flesh. It snapped back to Erilena’s face as the greenrider spoke, though, Ka’aen pressing his tongue against the roof of his mouth to prevent speaking, interrupting in instinctual defense for his Weyr. When she finished, though, he smiled, somber. “Wouldn’t you prefer your own loved ones’ happiness at the cost of someone else’s?” Returning to the previous metaphor, yes; it fit, here, kind of, in a way he hadn’t really planned. “The eggs weren’t entirely the reason, I don’t think. Just the catalyst.”

A pause, Ka’aen huffing a quiet, strained laugh. “Some point, you’ve gotta choose who you trust with the future, decide whether the end will justify the mean. It feels more complicated than it is, I think.” He’d thought that, of Ierana’s death; over time it’d become dreadfully simplified, a kind of grotesque fascination associated with the thought of her—his own moral compass and guilt. They’d been friends; he hadn’t seen; she’d died. It was, invariably, more complicated when emotions came into play—but they didn’t have to. They never had to. In this case, it would be, they fought, they fell; they were a means to an end they did not desire. Simple steps.

He acutely remembered how gutted he’d felt, like the entire world had spun off its axis, when J’lorin had dropped in for a visit, the way he’d closed eyes that felt like burning and his stomach had clenched in dread; remembered just as well the stirrings of sick revenge and twisted hope, the jumpy nervousness when they settled into Wasteland, the energy and the rush of doing. It would be like that for Selenitas, Ka’aen was sure, because Wasteland was not necessarily their enemy. Not if they didn’t want them to be. But necessity was necessity, if only they could see it that way.

Terror before hope.

Turnabout was fair play, Rhiiseth noted with a purr of amusement at Feyrianth’s retort; he licked blood from his muzzle, let it stain scarlet against the nebula of his foreclaws. He made a lazy, playful snap after her tail at the touch, tipped his head to blink with half-lidded eyes at the green. I presume not to dazzle with what I know of stark brightness, sun-maker, with the faintest hint of a slurring hiss in the ‘s’ of the title, The sun grazes noon in less than an hour. Tell me, then, dream-dancer, what beauty lies in flame, what fascination the dawn spreads in thy mind, and when night falls, I will teach you the music of the stars.

[Rei]

Perhaps it was selfish of her in a way. But Erilena seemed to be completely oblivious to Ka’aen’s discomfort. In truth she wasn’t, but acknowledging it would just make her own growing discomfort with the whole situation apparent. Not something she needed. Eyes that where previously on Feyrianth moved as she bowed her head and let her gaze travel to the grass near her feet. “You shouldn’t value anyone’s happiness over another persons. People are selfish by nature but I’ve always preferred trying to make people happy, to seeing them sad.” Even if it required some sort of sacrifice on her part. Especially for those she loved. All she wanted was the people she cared for to be happy, or at least content. Safe. That mattered more than anything to her. But not necessary at another person’s expense. Wasn’t there always a way to compromise? The greenrider didn’t care about the war. She just hated the strife it was bound to cause. Disliked these Wastelanders for bringing that war closer to Selenitas. No matter how inevitable it was that it would have come anyway, eventually. If not though them then through some other means. “It shouldn’t cost someone else their own happiness just to make another person happy. I know the world’s not perfect and it never will be. But it shouldn’t.” Yes perhaps such thinking was naïve but if she didn’t have her beliefs and stick with them than what did she have?

The bluerider’s quiet and strained laugh caused Erilena to inwardly bristle. They where very different this wastelander and herself. Perhaps in some ways they had something in common but they thought along very different paths. That much had become apparent during the conversation. Yes in some ways he was right but there was a part of the greenrider who refused to agree with everything he said. Whether it was stubbornness or something else she wasn’t sure. But at this point it didn’t matter. As Ka’aen went on it was Erilena’s turn to bite her tongue at least until he had finished. Her gaze came up then to lock on his. When she spoke the words where soft and decisive. “You know trust is a fragile thing and sometimes it seems the only person you can really trust with things is yourself. As far as the future goes I’m going to just trust that the decisions I make will be the right ones. So no it isn’t really as complicated as it seems to be. In that you are right.” There wasn’t any need to rely on anyone else, in the end no one could make her happy but herself. No one could fix things but herself. In the end was there really a need to compromise what she believed was right? No there wasn’t. Unfortunately Erilena was stubborn by nature and that much hadn’t changed.

With a soft smile she turned back to the dragons. There wasn’t anything more she wanted to say on the topic.

Feyrianth’s eyes whirled a tad faster at the playful snap. For a moment she was not sure what to make of it but just as quickly she decided to let it slide. Rhiiseth was only playing after all. There had not been an instance yet where he had seemed even vaguely threatening. With a soft purr resonating in her chest the four winged green stopped her cleaning and stretched her head up towards the sun above her eyes lidding in contentment. There is much beauty that lies in flame. The light dances through the trees and very sky illuminating even the darkest of places if it can touch it. The dawn is like a beginning. The awakening of the world, mine likes to call it a type of rebirth if you will. Wings flared outwards again. It is much easier to show you these things than speak of them Star Dancer. For I do not have the eloquence needed to do the sun justice. Besides. Seeing is believing is it not?

Arching her neck Feyrianth looked over at the blue and with a soft trill sprang into open air, her wings gently cupping the air and propelling her upwards as she leveled out in a glide and back winged to touch down behind her bonded. Head dipping she gave Erilena a gentle nudge purring in her throat as the woman gently scratched an eye ridge. One evening when night falls you must show me Rhiiseth. The green replied in a soft tone. The dragon was happy with her possible new friend. He was….different but she didn’t mind it one bit. Perhaps he was not as cuddlyor playful as some of her other friends had been. But well, one couldn’t have everything.

[Avu]

Selfish by nature. But see, he’d already accepted that, understood it because he was like that—it was easier, wasn’t it, to tune in the thought processes of others if you thought the same way? Hurt and kill by necessity; love if unavoidable, because all that lives dies. It shouldn’t be that way, like Erilena had said, but the sooner you accepted that it was, anyway, the sooner you moved on; the sooner you could do something, be someone. Besides…Ka’aen held his tongue, but that did not prevent the thought crossing his mind, leaving a thick feeling like guilt; besides…you had to look out for yourself, couldn’t blame yourself if someone else died, because they would, or you would, and then what? He and Rhiiseth—they functioned together. He and Ierana lived separate lives, the lines between them blurred, but different. She had died; he had not.

He nodded his head in quiet, half-agreement to Erilena’s words, glanced away towards Rhiiseth and Feyrianth, too; the way she’d turned away made it clear that she was no longer speaking. And so be it. Ka’aen knew what he thought and he understood her way of thinking, a kind of naivety mixed with experience, but he didn’t believe it. One person couldn’t do anything, not all alone. Many people…then you had something; then you could do something. Change the world; maybe your name wouldn’t make it to the records and the archives, but you’d do it, and that was all that mattered, wasn’t it?

“It’s a good way to think,” he murmured anyway, because Rhiiseth was invariably polite (or at least masked his insults well). Stepped back to give Feyrianth more room, inclined his head in a slightly sardonic gesture—she’d be leaving now that her green had fed. “You’ll understand if I say I’ll be trying to avoid the Infirmary, but I expect I’ll see you around.” His tone was neutral; faking warmth would be too obviously caught, Ka’aen expected, and in any case it didn’t matter; if Rhii had his way then he certainly would be seeing Erilena again.

Then I will greet the dawn when her earliest hand lifts the night to make way for day, a purred promise, curling like smoke, eyes blinking in slow contentment as the blue settled closer to his meal. Rebirth…but sunset paints death across the sky, the fade of your eternal flame. I will watch, sun-maker. His eyes blinked again, swirling slow greens. I will find you for the night-song, the blue added, a promise without the word, Even in twilight the sun will shine. His tail curled around the herdbeast’s gutted form, teeth dropping to the creature again. Until then, sun-dancer, I bid fair skies to thee.

A flash of dark humor spun like gold through his gaze, vanished into the mute greens and blues. Let the sun warm thee with its everlasting flame, the stars and moon sing thee to sleep…the very heavens will bow before you, O Sun-Maker. Rhiiseth dipped his own head like punctuation.