Pray to God he hears you {Open}

[Sheari]

"A mark for your thoughts?" asked R'men. The man had become increasingly concerned about his dragon and his intense silence. Weith was the main reason he had decided not to Impress any fire lizards or salamandyrs; the bronze was talkative enough! It still worried him though, especially with the dragon's mind shielded. R'men knew why he closed it off so, he understood his concern, and his fear. As far as Weith dared to extend his mind was only to those that he knew to be alive, the ones that had been in the clearing.

Still nothing came from the mind of Weith. Every now and then R'men would get snatches of thought from him. Philosophical segments of though process; contemplating Thread, dissecting the complexities of the weyr mechanics, the void of between.

Often the process would get hung up on the thoughts of between. The cold, airless void that dragons used to travel quickly. So many had accidents and died there, never to return to the sunlit, warm world. An accident, they could assume it was an accident and just mark him down on the list of failures if they hadn't already. After all, his only true friend was his clutchsister Minth, and to the best of his knowledge, she was gone. Gone, like the only home he'd ever known in his short life. R'men climbed onto the dragon's back, clutching tightly to the straps there. "If you're gonna do it, you're gonna do it with me," he said. No way was he going to lose Weith like that. The bronze swiveled his head. You will be fine, you could always re-Impress. Baoth's once had another, and Jingth's was once attached to a wher. "I'm not getting off," R'men said firmly, hooking straps to his belt. No.[/i] The word was dry and flat.

The two were in a deadlock. A pang of guilt and regret crept into the dragon's gut. It was one thing to end it for himself, it was another to end it for His. He hung his head forlornly, staring at the ground on which he lay. He closed his mind from R'men, hiding his thoughts in a dark crevice that he held private to himself all the time. Like a good friendship he often was open to His, but both still held their secrets, dimly lit cities in their minds that all the treacherous things sleep in. You will be... No, I won't Weith![/i] R'men's mental voice was calm and firm, but if he'd been speaking it would have cracked. His chest felt tight. The man climbed down to stare the dragon in the face, to see him head on.

We need you Weith, I need you, the rider pleaded. The response took R'men back. For what, precisely, do you need me?! So Jingth can underhandedly cut me down? So I can be the butt end of the jokes made? So I can be harassed by the others who don't give two shells about me?! For what, R'men, do you precisely need me?[/i] The voice thundered in the man's head like a storm. This wasn't Weith. This wasn't the happy bronze he'd Impressed a few turns back, with the bleeding tail, bursting from his shell hissing, ready to fight. This was not him.

"Weith! Have you lost your sense!? We are one here and have been for a while now. We are the same mind! You are a part of me as much as I am a part of you! If you..." R'men paused, catching his breath, anger practically roiling out of his ears. "If you do this, you will regret it. Think of the weyr, think of Minth...think of me." The last words were calm, almost a pleading whisper. The dragon's face was unreadable, faceted eyes whirling a myriad of confused colours and speeds. He turned and ran off, a copper bronze figure fleeing into the woods, into the mountains. All R'men could do was stand there and watch his mindmate go, hoping no one had heard his yelling, hoping someone had.

[Rowana]

"You know, arguing with your dragon is almost like arguing with yourself," Merridan's voice was passive. "I hear that's not healthy." If she'd meant it as a joke, not even her eyes laughed. Her face was a mask of calm, watching Weith go with a spark of worry in her eyes. This just wasn't right. She couldn't hear the whole conversation, but something was definitely wrong. She couldn't even imagine something making Chaoth upset enough to run away. "It's not safe out here," she added flatly. "Someone might see him." Let's face it, bronzes stood out even under all these trees. "Aren't you going after him?"

Chaoth? Can you find out what's bothering Weith? Merridan didn't really like getting involved in people's personal issues, but if things were this bad, it didn't look like they had a choice. I will try, Merridan, Chaoth replied sadly. But he may not wish to speak with me. The brown started off in Weith's path, a bit more careful to hide his presence. Catching his brother would not be hard with all these obstacles, but Chaoth didn't think that was the right approach. Weith-brother? he called, his voice echoed with calm and concern. Why do you run from Yours? Surly you will not leave him? The idea was unfathomable, so maybe it would be enough to get the bronze to answer. Chaoth had noticed his brother being rather closed off of late.

[Sheari]

Naturally, in such a situation, when you want someone to hear you and they do, you get frustrated that they did and you then want them to go away. R'men took a deep breath, those hateful, pain-ridden words still in his mind. For what, precisely,...a question he could not answer even if he had the answer. The rider turned to face Merridan - how long had she been there? - not knowing what to expect.

The calm she exuded was unfortunately not contagious and R'men's frayed nerves were on edge. Taking a deep breath he spoke, "He's upset that Minth didn't make it out, he thinks she's dead but won't try to reach for her and I understand that." He'd never lost a mindmate himself, but he'd seen people who had and had heard of there being a "void" that they tried to keep away from in their mind. "He's also feels like he's unimportant, like none of the other dragons care about him because Minth was really the only one he communicated with." For that, R'men blamed himself. Anusha was his sister and Minth was Weith's, it was the sibling bond that had kept them close and the shunning Weith had experienced that had driven them closer.

"He was moody after Jingth's flight and I guess this...whole situation was the last straw," R'men finished. He couldn't think of anything else and he turned his head, looking hopelessly after the shadows that his bronze had disappeared into. He felt alone, Weith being so angry with him right now that he could feel only the slightest bit of him, what couldn't be cut off.

The dragon lumbered through the trees with little care. He wanted to fly but that was denied him, and most of the other exiled dragons, he wanted to tear something apart but he couldn't because that might give him away. Knocking down trees was the only safe way but finding one that didn't reach the canopy would be hard so the venture would be foolish. He could do nothing in his rage until the voice of his brown brother invaded his mind. The bronze whipped around, scanning the trees with angry red eyes. Now and again a different colour would twirl in but it would quickly fade. I am fine Chaoth, return to Yours, this is a private matter.[/i] He couldn't see the brown but that didn't quite matter at the moment, the anger in his voice just the same as that he had directed to R'men. Speaking to Chaoth was different, he was not Minth after all. He'd never truly opened up to him and in his mind he half wanted to believe that the concern was only a ploy, way to mock him, but that was not the brown's way.

I am alone,[/i] he finally said, still unable to see the brown. When we return home, if we return home, I see no reason to go with you. I exist for the enjoyment of others, for Jingth to cut me down in subtle ways and to turn the others against me. I exist to be ridiculed, no matter the face I put on it. Now I exist for the simple continuation of Selenitas, because we are the last. When we return home, I will not go.[/i] To him it was fact with a simple solution. Though dragons had not good memories, Weith preferred remembering everything he could. Surely there was a plan to take back the weyr, they wouldn't leave the others to be ruled by outsiders. His muscles twitch as he itched to fly. Why not? Why didn't he break through the trees and defy the wills of the others, go against what they wished? He had turned that question over in his mind before with the same result; he was no fool, yet he had still run away from His like a child.

[Rowana]

Merridan was quiet while R'men spoke. Honestly, she didn't really understand why any of these things were reason enough for Weith to be this upset, but she had to admit, she didn't know the bronze well. To be angry enough to run from your rider, though, was pretty bad. Mer sighed, frowning deeply. This really wasn't her territory. Someone like Raebeli might have managed better, but she wasn't here either. "Sounds to me, like he's being childish," she said bluntly. "We may not have been close, but Chaoth and I do care what happens to you," she went on firmly. "We all left people behind, but if we don't hold together now, we'll all die. That includes you and Weith."

Chaoth kept up his pace without slacking. I will not return, Weith, he answered, still calm as ever. You risk us all with these actions. He slowed, stopping a short distance from the bronze. Turning his head, he regarded his brother with blue, swirled eyes. Weith was certainly more upset than he'd first suspected. In part, Chaoth felt some blame was his for not seeing it sooner. He would put this right now. You are not alone. You have Yours. Will you leave him? the brown asked again. His tone was firm and sincere. I hope you do not believe we all wish you gone. Have I ever turned on you, brother?

[Sheari]

...you risk us all with these actions... Weith stopped with that fact. That simple fact kept his rampage at a halt. There was a pause as he turned to stare at his brother. Out of the entire clutch, the brown was probably the most level-headed, the one with the most sense. The question posed cause Weith's eyes to whirl less violently. No, he was not alone, he would always have His. He'd chosen R'men from all those put before him, had found comfort in the then-scared man he was not today. No,[/color] responded Weith, Never.[/color] Forget those thoughts before, they weren't seriously entertained...right?

Other colours, blues and greens, even the yellow of worry and concern mixed with the angry red, thought they fled slower than before. A dragon's confusion was often hard to hide. You never turned on me, brother he said. You were one of the few, but he kept that strain private. Angry as he was he began to see reason, though the pain he felt still burned. Was it false pain? Was he just asuming?

R'men decided not to disclose to Merridan their argument just before her arrival. Perhaps it was better that he had run off, he knew the bronze would not leave him, at least...not without him. "I know that there were others left behind, that we all, essensially, lost loved ones, its hard for Weith though because he lost his only friend," the man said, discounting himself. He couldn't vouch for the social lives of the other Riders and their dragons. True that not all the dragons were mean to him, but it was just like meeting a polite stranger; they'd be nice and they would care, but they only became friends after a while. R'men knew well that you could be siblings but that didn't mean you were friends.

"Perhaps it is childish, but I don't see anything I can do about it now. He's gone, run off," R'men said, gesturing behind him. "I know he'll come back but I can only hope he'll listen to me." Was this how it was with Northerners? Did people often argue with their dragons? The bond was strong, Impression wasn't for everyone, but beyond that the dragons are still individuals, they are still their own mind. R'men felt lost, he judt didn't know what to make of it.

[Rowana]

Chaoth dipped his head, rumbling deep in his throat a calming note. He settled under a large tree in a relaxed position. Weith had stopped running, which was a good start. Perhaps now they could at least talk sensibly. And I never will, Chaoth told him firmly. It was true. He simply wasn't that kind of dragon. Running is not the way to show the others you are strong, is it? he asked reasonably. The games of youth are long over, Weith. Old pains and conflicts are pointless. Only together can we be strong. Even you and Jingth. Chaoth pondered the gold thoughtfully. He wondered if he aught to have a word with her about this, but he didn't want to interfere in the business of others. Perhaps he could convince Weith to approach her himself.

Merridan nodded briefly, sparing a glance into the trees. They'd stopped, that was good. It was only a small step though and Mer doubted she and Chaoth could really fix this mess on their own. "Chaoth is trying to talk sense to him," she told R'men, trying to sound as confident as she could. "And he's got more sense than me, most days." She frowned, thinking. Going back alone was suicide, so finding out if Minth was still there was practically impossible. Auran might manage, but the invaders had surely taken measures against that. She didn't want to take the risk. "It's hard for all of us," she said, a little softer. "Chaoth is going stir crazy being stuck inside so much. Weith just needs time." I hope, Mer thought doubtfully. "We could," she added uncertainly. "Come round now and then. If being lonely is part of the problem." Truthfully, she'd lost most of the people she usually hung out with herself, she just hid it well.

[Sheari]

Was he strong? Weith wasn't sure anymore. He was strong once, he knew that. Sitting prim and proud at lessons before he and his clutchmates had been fully recognized as dragons. No longer were they weyrlings, fledglings, the youngest wing. Nay, they had risen now into their ranks, while the humans had their own ranks among them, the dragons would always be defined by colour and character. Perhaps, if his hide was blue would this sort of action be more accepted? Unification. A maw was more powerful than the teeth alone His had once told him. A modified metaphor, for Weith hadn't understood fists and palms at the time.

You are right, Chaoth,[/i] the bronze admited. Yes, even Jingth had to act within the whole. Weith dipped his head in shame, though his pride knawed at him to hold it high. He had to get a hold on himself, excercize the dicipline he had learned.

No lie there, with this situation being hard. Why did the northerners have to involve them in their war? What did Selenitas have that they wanted so desperately? He may never know and may never want to know. "I'm not entirely sure that loneliness is his issue. To be honest I don't know what his issue is, exactly. I have a feeling that he redirected our argument away from it but he's confused right now, terribly confused and I could be feeling that." Helpless, that was how he, R'men, felt. He didn't know much about anyone else's dragons, it was private bond, an intimate one forged between the Impressed. From what he gathered, and from Merridan's comment, Chaoth seemed to be sensible (wheren't most browns that way?). "Well, if Weith is willing to talk to him through his rage maybe hanging out would be best, for our sanity and theirs," he said, smiling to maybe help lift the mood.

[Rowana]

Chaoth moved forward and offered Weith a gentle nuzzle with his nose. He rumbled pleasantly in his throat. He was relieved that the bronze was no longer running and was finally listening. It would take time to heal old wounds, but perhaps this was a start. Feel no shame, Brother Weith, the brown assured him. We all stray from our path sometimes. It is why we need each other. Yes, even he did. Chaoth had no illusions and he knew he was not perfect. Will you come back with me? Yours must be worried.

Merridan frowned again. If Weith and R'men were confused, then she was positively baffled. She didn't think she really had anything else to offer. Vaguely she got the sense that Chaoth was making progress, but he was keeping the conversation between him and his brother private. At least the hanging out idea seemed to get some positive response. "Sanity is good," she agreed with some relief. "How are you with a blade?" Not to change the subject, but she found she could remember. "We could practice or I could teach you while Chaoth visits Weith." Just sitting around and talking wasn't her style. She would much rather be doing something.

[Sheari]

Thank you, Chaoth, for helping me back into my right mind.[/color] The bronze turned and rose to his feet. He felt almost tired, the burst of rage and anger requiring energy. I will follow you back.[/color] Tentatively Weith reached out to the mind if His; something so familiar yet he was afraid of what he might find there. Would R'men be angry with him for what he'd done? Would he be upset that the bronze had yelled at him so? A wave of concern from the man threatened to wash over Weith and he recoiled slightly away from it. I am sorry, R'menmine.[/color] It would be a few mintues before the dragons returned to view.

A blade? The crude thing he'd stolen from the kitchen when he was still a weyrling came to mind. He recalled that Weith had not been impressed. "I can eat with one but as for much of anything else...yeah..." Was he embarassed? Yes, yes he was. Who ever heard of a bronzerider that couldn't fight with a knife?! He could fight with his fists and he was pretty sure he knew the places on a man that would hurt the most when kicked. It was sad, almost, that he couldn't properly stab someone. "That sounds good," he remarked on Merridan's suggestion to teach him. Women were often the ones teaching him things and he felt more comfortable learning from them. Men tended to be harsh and to use humiliation as a teaching tool.

"I don't have many marks, left them back at the weyr, would you happen to have a spare blade? For when the lessons begin?" He asked, smiling sheepishly. Women teachers also tended to make him feel foolish; the runner he'd tried riding came to mind and how little he knew about it compared to whats-her-name did. Well, at least this time he wouldn't be thrown around like a ragdoll while Weith lounged nearby laughing at him. Yes, sanity was good.

[Rowana]

Chaoth crooned reassuringly. You are quite welcome, Weith, he replied pleasantly. He was more than willing to help his siblings out whenever they needed it. He found it his duty to see that everyone was doing their best, after all. I am only sorry I did not help you sooner. Chaoth did regret that. He really aught to have noticed the bronze's mood before it got so bad. Still, at least he had been able to help when he could. Chaoth rose and trotted after Weith back to their riders. We are returning, MerridanMine he called happily.

Merridan cocked her head as relief entered her face. "Looks like they're coming back," she told R'men with a smile. Thanks, Chaoth, she whispered back. Sometimes her brown could do a whole lot more good than she could. Mer did know she wasn't the greatest people person ever. She chuckled at R'men's answer of how much he knew of knives. It wasn't that much of a laughing matter, since they would all need the skill before long, but it felt good to relax a little right now. "Yeah, I can lend you one," she agreed. She had several of various sizes after all. "I usually practice first thing in the morning, that alright with you?"